Toasties turned up in surprising numbers at the recently held Division B Learning session.
Div B Governor JJ Letargo was of course there. Jazz Encarnacion, Gege Sugue, Ed Ebreo, Boom San Agustin, Christine Dapa, Sheila Dela Cruz, Mike Jacinto, Eden Alemania, Dan Li and Alice Bagadiong also attended.
Gege Sugue talked about BNT's experience in building club awareness through the web while Jazz shared some tips in using the Toastmasters International Website.
Here are some of the photos.
By Edwin Ebreo
This post is inspired by an educational speech i delivered at El Presidente Toastmasters club. Thanks to club President Marilyn Abella for the opportunity.
When people join Toastmasters it is mostly for one purpose and that is to enhance their public speaking skills. What not too many people appreciate is that Toastmasters is a great training ground for developing leadership and management skills among others. the functions members Play is a practicum for some corporate management roles. Let me cite them one by one.
(In case you don't get to finish reading this post, be forewarned that the Toastmasters Leadership Training that I am tackling here only works for those who want and strive to be better. Practically nothing can be learned from mediocrity. This only applies to those who subscribe to the idea that anything worth doing is worth doing well.)
Sgt-at-Arms a.k.a. Events Manager
If you get elected to this post, you will be responsible for seeing to it that club meetings run smoothly. It means all logistics are prepared, people know what to expect and how to behave and their needs are anticipated and addressed. Taking the challenge of regularly coordinating toastmasters meetings and getting better at it every time develops your skill for events management. It sharpens your anticipation, planning and coordinating skills. It helps you develop the discipline needed by events managers for ingress and egress.
Treasurer a.k.a. club CFO
When you take on this role, you are not only holding the clubs coffers, you are managing its finances. You worry about revenue generation, cash flow and liquidity. You learn to forecast, plan and control because you of all people in the club knows how much money it takes to maintain the club's lifestyle. Aren't those the same exact things that finance managers do in a business?
Secretary a.k.a. Knowledge Manager
The secretary keeps the club's record, keeps minutes of meetings and ensure accessibility of information when needed. By that I mean not just during this term but long after. Many corporations now invest in keeping corporate history in tact as people come and go. It helps keep people aligned and motivated to contribute to that history in a positive way. It helps keep good practices, stay as good practices from one manager to the next. A good secretary ensures that information and communication is archived and ready for use when needed. It takes planning, strategic thinking, persistence and resilience to do this right. this job builds character.
VP- PR a.k.a. Head of Marketing
This is an amazingly challenging and exciting job. When I took this role, I looked at the job description and realized I have very little preparation for it. I searched high and low for ways to generate awareness about our club and got interested in Internet marketing and SEO. The result is BnT website becoming one of the top results for finding clubs in Makati and Philippines. It also became a source of information for managing clubs and meetings, not to mention entertaining and chock full of wisdom speeches from club members. We get inquiries almost everyday and get new members regularly thanks to having meetings that are worth attending. as they say the sales man sells the first machine, the engineers sell the rest. Know what i mean?
VP- Membership a.k.a. Head of HR.
This role has two important objectives. They are recruitment and retention. The incumbent gets help from VP-PR in attracting guests but once they attend the meeting, our Head of HR must have a strategy for getting them enrolled and later on engaged. They make sure that the guests feel the love of the club. When they become members, they are integrated in the club and not stick out like a sore thumb. It takes the sensibility and nurturing of a good HR Manager to do this job right. I recommend that you look to HR Managers for inspiration on how to do this job. The good ones, not the ones who suck.
VP-Education a.k.a. COO
Think about it. If Toastmasters is all about education, then this person is definitely the boss. It takes a great combination of leadership and management skills to do this job right. The end product of this operation are the CC's AC's, CL's and AL's. As expected the head of operations works with marketing to generate the customers, HR to keep them and the mentors as aides in keeping them moving towards their goals. if you are head of operations, you can't afford to make excuses for not producing the needed results. You know that failing to deliver the right numbers of CC's, etc. Is like failing the business. Isn't this a good laboratory for operations management?
President a.k.a. CEO, a.k.a. Chief Inspirer , a.k.a. Great Leader
Definitely not Chief Slave. The reason for a company's failure is the failure of the leader to lead and inspire. This to me is both the easiest and the hardest job of all. It's the easiest when the leader manages to form a cohesive working team. When everyone is clear about the goals and all play their roles well, the leader doesn't have much to do but to keep everyone inspired and motivated. It's the hardest because inspiring people to do their jobs well is not the easiest thing in the world to do. As a matter of fact, some Presidents find it easier to fill in the jobs of non-functioning officers than inspire them to do their job. The keys to a President's success are the same keys to any Leadership success. Let me borrow from Kouzes and Posner to describe those keys. They are; inspiring a shared vision, modeling the way, empowering others to act, challenging the process and encouraging the heart. What I learned from experience is you cannot demonstrate all these leadership practices in absence. A good CEO has to be present and in the thick of things in order to make all these happen.
There are other leadership and management skills to be learned in Toastmasters that run across all leadership and management positions of organizations. They are mentoring and evaluating.
Mentoring a new club member (or a new club President in the case of Immediate Past Presidents) is an important human resource development activity that all supervisors and managers must learn how to do. It's important for them to be able to help shape people's skills and abilities so they can contribute optimally to their organizations. The same is true with club mentors, their job is not just to answer questions that new members or new presidents have but help shape them to achieve their full Toastmasters potential. You can't be a good mentor if you are acting like a help desk to your "protege". A manager cannot be a good mentor if they think that telling their staff to let them know if they have any question so they can respond to them.
My friend TM Boom San Agustin said employees don't need criticism, to improve their performance, they need encouragement. The best place to learn how to do that is in Toastmasters. Whenever you evaluate a fellow member's speech you keep in mind that you want this person to deliver another speech and a better one at that. You use the various techniques that you learned from other members to do this job right. You know very well that after you evaluated a speaker, you will be evaluated on how well you were able to point out the person's strengths, how clearly you shared your suggestions on how the person can improve and how you were able to encourage the speaker to do it again. That's another way for you to learn how to get better at it, another way to learn how to give better feedback to your employees if you are a manager.
There you have it, all possible leadership and management skills that I can think of at the moment that you can learn by joining and becoming an officer of a Toastmasters club. So, join a club, take a role and STRIVE TO BECOME GREAT AT IT. As I said, there's practically nothing to be learned when you are being mediocre at what you do. Make Toastmasters your laboratory, and then apply your discoveries to your leadership and management responsibilities in your other organizations. This is the way to make the most of your Toastmasters membership.
Women are wonderful
Toastmaster Speech No 6: Vocal Variety
by: Shel Roxas
A lot of men can’t understand how we think, how we come up with a decision but in the end we become victorious in what we do. Ever get exasperated with how women act? At the end of this speech, men would realize that it is not that hard to understand our gender at all. There’s also the thrill of knowing how women think and I hope you would be as excited as I am when I impart this knowledge to you. As for the women, I hope you can find some “aha” moments as I go along.
Woman are always managing to have some last minute things to do immediately prior boarding the car, like going to the toilet, talking with kids or giving instructions to household help. And then, Lavishly sprays perfume on herself inside an air-conditioned car making other passengers gasp desperately for air. Complaining at the same time that she has noting to wear and does not have enough closet space (I am guilty of this by the way).
Contrary to claim of radical feminists, there are basic differences between men and women. Since the release of the latest comedy 'The Ugly Truth' the male-female intimate relationship structures are again under observation. Even though it is a comedy revisiting the old and well-known cliche of male and female differences it still leaves couples and singles going home and re-thinking the gender differences.
Let's have a look at the truth behind some of the points mentioned in the movie:
It is known that 'men feel love when they are being intimate and women are ready to be intimate when they feel loved'. In a study of more than 100 couples this statement was agreed upon in 100% of the cases. One of the main points of challenges in the relationship between the genders is that both sides expect the other to play on their turf and speak their language.
Men are visual. It is proven that men are stimulated by visual input How else would the 'magazines such as FHM, Maxim, Uno make millions of pesos every year? This leads us into the area of exercise which was quoted in the movie: If you want a relationship, here is how you get one: It's called a Stairmaster (a stairmaster is an exercise equiptment for butt shaping exercises). It is a fact that men and women put more effort into exercise and being fit when summer is on our door step. So really, who are they shaping up for, themselves or the opposite sex? And yes, women also prefer a six pack to a beer belly... I bet men love the hourglass shape.
Men and women are equally looking for affirmation. Laughing at whatever the man says has more to do with being in rapport with each other than anything else Laughter is used as a signal for being part of a group, in this case the couple - it signals acceptance and positive interactions with others. Isn't that what we want with our mate?
Now it is a challenge to figure out what women mean, but it is not easy to understand why women do things they do. We talk so much? Why are we always shopping? Why we spend so much time and money in the beauty parlor? Or why we nag?
For men, talking is basically done in order to convey information. For women, it is different. Women would find it a waste of time if they were together and they did not talk all the time. Women talk in order to participate and build relationships. So the more she talks to you, the more she is showing that she likes you and that you find favor with her. So when she gives you a silent treatment, she dislikes you. So rejoice when you are getting an earful.
Women shop a lot. For men, they shop when they need something specific. And while they might compare items here and there, they would decide fairly quickly and make the purchase. Us women, we take our grand time comparing prices endlessly but may have no specific item in mind to purchase. We find it hard to resist bargains, and will buy a lot that we don’t need simply because it is on sale. But think about the benefit it will have to you when she gets home happy and then there’s peace at home. You might be able to get that date you’ve been asking for because she wants to show off her new dress. Ever wonder why I was able to collect 60 shoes (which went down to 6 after the typhoon Ondoy yet went up to 25 after 3 weeks)? Go figure.
Men get haircut because their hair is already long. Women go to the parlor to get their hair, nails, and toes done. But again what happens in the parlor is a therapy. That place is a totally different environment women are exposed to from day to day. For me, it removes stress. The latest Korean Drama story from my Korean pedicurist is a bonus for me specially I don’t have the time to watch this on TV.
As it is know that men and women are different. We will always see things differently. We have different needs. We love differently. There will often be tension and even resentment. Men do not have to resist or resent the difficulties brought by this differences but you can celebrate such differences.
Now let me give you my final advise by a way of a parable.
Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. He was supposed to be killed but the monarch was astounded by his youth and ideals. Instead the monarch would grant him freedom if he can answer a very difficult question: What do women really want? He was given 1 year to answer it otherwise he will be killed. Arthur asked everyone in his kingdom but nobody can answer. Many people advise him to consult an old witch – only she knows the answer. Pressed for time and no alternative. Arthur sought for the witch. The witch asked Arthur for his friend’s hand in marriage, Gawain in exchange for the answer. Gawain has agreed to this arrangement as he value his friends life. The witch gave the answer and that is “What women really wants is to be in-chrage”. Fast forward to Arthur being freed and to Gawain’s wedding day. The witch showed her worst manner coupled with her hideous appearance. Who would want that for a wife? Til their wedding night. As Gawain entered the bedroom, he saw the a very beautiful lady. The lady told him that half of herself is a witch - her other half is a beauty. She gave the decision to Gawain, “Which would you like me to be in the morning, and which during the night? What a cruel question. During the day, a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his own, an old witch? Or would he prefer a hideous witch at morning but by night a beautiful woman whom to enjoy intimate moments. If it were you what would you do?
Gawain replied that he would let her choose for herself (remember the witch’es answer to Young Arthur?) Upon hearing this, she announced that she will be beautiful all the time. Because he respect her enough to let her be in-chrage of her own life.
What is the moral of the story?
The moral is: if your woman doesn’t get her own way, things are going to get ugly. And that I leave you to discover and experience yourself throughout your lifetime.
Urban Dwellers, Get Involved! We can plan our future!
Toastmasters Speech Project No. 2: Organize your speech
By: Faye F. Melegrito
A day before typhoon Ondoy unleashed its wrath in Metro Manila and nearby provinces, I was preparing my and my six-year-old daughter Luce’s week-end gear. We were to spend the next two days in Makati, as we were supposed to join the 3-km event of the New Balance Power Run. Makati was a more convenient take-off point to the event at the Fort on September 27, rather than our home in Marikina, a couple of hours away. As an afterthought, I placed her Enchanted Kingdom poncho raincoat atop her I Can Serve Foundation shirt. “In case it drizzles during the run,” I told myself.
As we all know, it did not drizzle that week-end of September 26 and 27. The gates of heaven opened wide and poured far-from-heavenly rain on Filipino urbanites, drenching not just our bodies and our homes, but our souls as well. In the aftermath, as the people waded through floodwaters, as they dug through their belongings mixed with mud and garbage, different sectors started blaming each other, pointing an accusing finger on each other’s negligence and supposed role in the tragedy that Ondoy brought us.
The Ondoy experience now proves to be a good wake up call for all of us, whether we are mere citizens of the Philippines or officials, policy drafters, or lawmakers of the land. All of us, no matter our status in life, are stakeholders in our planet, in our country, in our habitat, in our urban dwellings. And as stakeholders, we hold responsibility for our future.
Allow me to share with you these passages from the UN Habitat website: “The United Nations has designated the first Monday of October every year as World Habitat Day. The idea is to reflect on the state of our towns and cities and the basic right of all to adequate shelter. It is also intended to remind the world of its collective responsibility for the future of the human habitat. This year’s theme “Planning our urban future” aims to raise awareness of the need to improve urban planning to deal with new challenges of the 21st century. This is because urban settlements in all parts of the world are being influenced by new and powerful forces. In both developed and developing countries, cities and towns are increasingly feeling the effects of climate change, resource depletion, food insecurity, population growth and economic instability.”
I now take this opportunity to challenge you, my fellow urban dwellers, to take action towards a well-planned future in urban Philippines. For starters, I share with you three circles of influence within which we can start planning our urban future.
The first circle of influence is the easiest, as it involves only our individual selves.
Perhaps, we can start by taking stock of our personal practices. Do we drive our self to the community mall when we can walk instead? Do we ride the elevator two floors up, while we can take the stairs? Do we run our errands crisscrossing the metropolis, while we can plan our route and maximize our errand time? Do we throw our small items of rubbish here and there, while we can keep them in our pockets and later throw them in a garbage can somewhere? Do we lavishly take long baths and showers, when we can use timba and tabo? Do we prefer motorcycles over bikes, battery-powered items over wind-ups, plastic bags over eco bags? I hope we can proudly answer, “No, I don’t. I care for my habitat.”
A caring individual carries the good habits with him or her, constantly practices them, and eventually becomes their embodiment, possibly inspiring the bigger circles around him or her.
The second circle of influence is not that far from us, as it includes our family and friends.
Let us now widen our circle and invite our families and friends to join us in our quest for a better urban future. Do we place our garbage in one bin instead of segregating them? Do we use separate cars instead of carpooling? Do we spend much time on television or video games instead of playing electricity-free and creative-rich games? Do we prefer a concrete backyard over a greener one, new items over recycled ones? I hope we can proudly answer, “No, my family and friends don’t. We care for our habitat.”
A caring family passes on to the younger generations and even future generations the traits of responsibility and accountability, creating generations of individuals who care.
The third circle of influence is much wider, as it now encompasses our community, be this our residential community, office community, or online community.
Let us next enlist our respective communities in our move to have a better urban future. Do we confine ourselves inside our houses rather than go out and participate in community endeavors? Do we practice kanya-kanya, tayo-tayo, or sila-sila, rather than join forces as one community? Do we tend to complain rather than suggest alternatives or passively receive benefits rather than actively participate in planning? I hope we can proudly answer, “No, our community don’t. We care for our habitat.”
A caring community leads to stronger and more collective action, an advantageous leverage if we want our Congress Representatives to hear our calls for a greener district.
A little over a week after typhoon Ondoy left the Philippine area of responsibility, the world celebrated World Habitat Day last October 5. This year’s theme: “Planning our urban future” now sounds more personal to us, Filipinos. The Filipino urban dwellers face the seemingly unsurmountable task of rebuilding our homes and our lives.
A mere raincoat will not surely protect us from future typhoons, as our urban kingdom has lost its enchantment. However, no mud-filled floodwater could wash away the Filipino people’s strong spirit. Let us be caring individuals from a caring family, in a caring community. Let us do our part as individuals, as a family, as a community. Let us get up, get out, get involved!
Opening Remarks at the Officer Installation and New Member Induction
Speaker: Gege Sugue
Speech Project: Uplift the Spirit from the Specialty Speeches Manual
Time: 8 to 10 minutes
Good evening, Pat, Jun, (the missing Alvin Tan), Shel, Christian, (the absent Christine), Sheila, Boom. Congratulations for accepting the challenge and the responsibilities of leadership of this club. I salute you for your courage and commitment.
Good evening, Toastmasters. Your being here tonight is also an indication of your commitment to and faith in the Toastmasters organization.
Much has been said about the benefits that the Toastmasters organization offers its members. One of the least harped about of these benefits is the fact that you meet a lot of people. And I don't mean that in a networking kind of way; it's not just about expanding your business contacts. I mean we meet different types of interesting, engaging people. Some of them become your friends. Some become your mentors, or tormentors, or all of the above. I've met a lot of people who have encouraged me, inspired me, and taught me lessons.
I only have time to talk about 3 of them. These 3 have taught me 3 lessons that have been useful in my stints as officer of this club.
One of them was Mar Sy. For those who did not have the privilege of knowing Mar, he was one of the charter members of the club. That means he was one of those who had the vision for a community of human resource practitioners learning and developing together. From day one of this club, he was an active participant of the club, shaping this club to be what it is now.
I met and got to know Mar here at Toastmasters. And he taught me to seize the day.
I'll be honest. Mar was not a cookie-cutter type leader. No leader-like demeanor; no gregarious, extroverted personality. He was rather shy, laid-back, soft spoken. But he did not let his shyness stop him from answering the call to lead. He was a charter officer. And on his second year in Toastmasters, he was an Area Governor.
I wouldn't also consider him a natural born speaker. Like most of us, he really needed Toastmasters to bring out the speaker in him. But did he let his limitations stop him? No, he grabbed every opportunity to speak and to develop his speaking skills. He didn't miss any opportunity to participate in Table Topics as either speaker or host. Who knows how much more he would have grown as a speaker given the chance.
Unfortunately, death robbed him of that chance. However tragic that loss may be, for me it has served the purpose of reminding me to seize the day. Not to waste opportunities. Not to let moments for growth pass me by.
Last term when I was the president of this club, that was the longest year of my life. One full year, 525,600 minutes of thinking, talking, breathing Toastmasters. A year divided into segments of 2 weeks, the first part of which spent on planning the meeting, and the last 2 days of which fixing up the messed up plans because speakers backed out and evaluators canceled.
It was the longest year of my life. But it was also the shortest. Because at the end of it, when the leadership was wrestled away from me (insert smile here) I still haven't had enough. Still a lot of unfinished business. Things I should have done but didn't. But I had to move on, because as Mars has shown me with his life and his premature death, time is valuable, and the day is there for me to do more and be more. I will seize the day. I will grab every opportunity to lead, learn, and live life to the fullest.
The second person I met in Toastmasters is Michelle Lim, the founding president of this club.
John Maxwell said that the arena where one can truly challenge and develop one's leadership is in volunteerism. Because the members are not paid. Because they are not beholden to any boss and their careers are not at stake if they mess up. Toastmasters is such an environment. Everyone is free to join and leave. So a leader needs to know how to charm, coerce, communicate to lead and motivate.
Maxwell also stresses the importance of communication skills to lead.
Michelle is the embodiment of that twin pairing of leadership and communication. Communication skills ooze from her pores. She inspires with a vision. She motivates, encourages, mentors. She did such a great job of leading this club that on its first year, with just 9 months to do it, she led us to achieving Select Distinguished Club status. And a huge part of the time, she was out of the country. That's leadership.
Michelle is a good leader because she can talk, and she can walk the talk. What she has taught me is to lead the way. She does not pressure members to deliver speeches. She shows us by delivering speech after speech after speech. She earns a minimum of 2 norms a year. So, when I was president, I tried to follow her example. I wanted the members to deliver speeches, so I delivered speeches, and earned my Advanced Communicator Bronze as a reward. I wanted people to work on their Competent Leader Manual. So even if I did not have to do it, because I was already aiming for Silver, I still did. Because Michelle showed me that that was the way to lead to the way.
Dear officers, there is no avoiding it. Lead the way. Tell us why and then show us how.
And now, on to the third person.
I truly think that the most difficult post in Toastmasters is that of VP Education, and this person has been VP Education 1 1/2 times, the 1/2 being when he took over when Mar could no longer attend the club meetings. Being VP Education can make or break you.
It almost broke this man. Every other week, he would feel like killing himself as he worked on the cumbersome Program. I saw him wanting to gouge his eyes as he worked on a multicolored matrix, size 6 font, trying to schedule the roles and speakers. And in the end, no one even used that matrix.
But did he break? Nah.
Did he come to the meetings, bitter at the no-shows, angry at being VP Ed? No, Ed Ebreo, with bandaged wrists and red-shot eyes came ready to have the best meeting possible. Ed is right; meetings without him are just not as fun. He reminds me all the time that BnT is about fun, about learning in an environment of fun. He reminds me of celebrating victories and laughing at miseries. He was always willing to be the butt of jokes, all for the sake of having fun at Toastmasters meetings. He taught me the 3rd lesson of leadership -- make it look like play.
Ed makes leadership look so easy that last term, we had an unprecedented number of people wanting to be officers. They wrestled the gavel away from us, wanting to be the new officers, wanting to lead.
And so here you are -- our new, spanking officers. The people who will lead this club to higher levels of excellence and achievement.
As I turn this gavel over to you, I challenge you.
Learn and apply the 3 lessons I learned from the 3 people I met. Listen to Mar, Michelle, and Ed. This is your chance to:
Seize the day.
Lead the way.
Make it look like play.
It's your chance to make a difference and help others become better leaders and communicators.
It's your time to inspire. So that by May 2010, you will have a new set of eager officer-wanna be's, raising their hands, shouting, me! me! choose me! I want to lead.
I know you'll do well. And I am hear to support you. I promise. And I seal that promise by banging this gavel and saying for the last time, as outgoing President of Butter N Toast Toastmasters Club, I now call this meeting to order.
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(by Sheila Dela Cruz-Mapanao, CC, CL)
I delivered this speech last July 9, 2009 at our Toastmasters meeting, as a tribute to Mars. This is speech #2 of the Advanced Communication Manual, on "Special Occasion Speeches".
I hope i was able to do justice to the man that Mars was.
Good evening, fellow Toastmasters and friends.
These past weeks while I was formulating this speech in my head, I was panicking. Not because I didn’t know what I wanted to say. But because I didn’t know what NOT to say! There are just so many things about Mars and his life, what I learned from him, and how he has affected me. I was overwhelmed!
So to put a semblance of order in this speech, let me focus on what I believed were the “first things” in Mars’ life.
In Stephen Covey’s “7 Habits of Highly Effective People”, Habit 3 is “Put first things First”, meaning “putting the most important things in your life, FIRST”. First things could be your goals or dreams, or the people you love.
As Johann Goethe said, “Things which matter most should never be at the mercy of things which matter least”.
And I believe Mars knew what the first things in his life were.
Top on his list, was his family. Mars lost his father at a young age. When his father died, he became the family’s breadwinner. And he did his job dutifully. He became a pillar of strength and support for his family. He provided for his mom and his siblings. He worked to support his youngest sister from the time she was in grade school, until she graduated with a Nursing degree and passed the board exams last December. And when she graduated, he told friends, “Pwede na kong mamatay.” (Finally I can die). Even then, he knew that since he already secured his youngest sister’s future, she would be able to take his place ad care of his mom and the rest of their family.
Mars role as a pillar of strength and dependability was not just contained within his family, but extended to another family, and that was Toastmasters, and specifically, Butter N Toast (BnT).
Mars’ commitment to BnT stemmed from his desire to learn. Personal improvement. Another one of Mars’ first things. Mars was the perfect example of someone who wanted to improve himself. He wanted to be better!
When we started out in Toastmasters, we were all pretty scared of coming up here in front. Especially during table topics! But no, not mars! He was always so brave! He’d volunteer, and yes, he’d fumble or mumble, BUT he kept at it and he got better! And I admired that in him. Me, who’s such a scare-dy cat when it comes to Table Topics. And he knew it!
He also knew that I dreaded to club-hop coz I hated being the odd one out. So what did Mars do? Whenever he got invited to a different club, he’d drag me to come with him. And he was a willing companion when I got invited to other TM clubs as well, egging me on to accept invites. Such that we became more like a package deal. Invite one TM, get another for free! :)
He generally pushed and pulled me out of my comfort zone and conveniently served as my net. My safety blanket.
I also loved to tease him by the monicker Table Topics Monster because whenever he was tasked to handle Table Topics, he chose particularly challenging topics. But he had a special reward, a token, which he gave to the brave participants to encourage them.
And let us not forget that Mars was the first-ever from our Club to take on the role of Area 16 governor. He made it look sooo easy, that he convinced some others from this club, to be Area governor as well! :)
From Mars’ life, another of his first things was Relationships. Mars had loads of friends both in and out of BnT. Friends from college, and even all the way from grade school, who have stuck with him and who consider him a VERY GOOD friend. And I, together with the Toasties, know what they mean.
Most Toasties know Mars and his quick-wit.
His loud, boisterous laugh.
His zeal and energy for fun.
But maybe not everyone knows his thoughtfulness and generosity. I remember when he retired from Pru Life, he treated at least 10 of his closest TM friends to a sumptuous dinner buffet at Masas. And how when one of us was celebrating a birthday, he’d treat that person to Starbucks.
Yes, he was thoughtful and generous, giving of his time and his presence. That, and above all, Mars was a loyal, and trustworthy friend.
Text mate. Erstwhile shopping and movie-watching companion. Toastmasters Club-hopping buddy. Confidante. True and good friend. Mars was all these to me.
I was scrolling through my cellphone’s phonebook recently and felt a tinge of sadness when I saw Mars’ name in my phonebook. And knowing that I won’t be receiving any funny, text messages or calls from him just to ask me how I was. I couldn’t for the life of me, delete his name from my phone book.
Any significant event now, any small thing, reminds me of mars. Michael Jackson dead at 50? Oh, mars was only 42 when he died. Gege and I were eating at Bagoong Club (where BnNT had its xmas party), and our server’s name happened to be mars. We looked at each other, and at the same time, said “awww, mars”…
You can say I haven’t had enough of Mars. Most people who know Mars feel the same way. Clichéd as it may sound, Mars has left his mark on us, here in our hearts. I keep telling myself that he’s in a better place now, free from pain, sickness, and problems. But when I think about him now, it is still with sadness because I miss him.
He was a good person. A good man. And he will be sorely missed.
Mars was a dutiful and supportive son and brother --which meant he valued family.
He was a good and true friend -- which meant he valued relationships.
He was serious about teaching and about learning -- which meant he valued personal improvement.
Family. Relationships. Personal improvement. Mars was clear on his first things. He knew what was important to him, and his actions reflected that.
I leave you now with these questions. What are the first things in your life? Do your actions reflect the importance of these first things? Mars’ death has made me think and reflect on these.
Mars was clear on his first things. Are you?
Six years ago today, I held my baby girl in my arms for the first time. We did not expect her until September 29. My husband even hoped she’d have the same birthday as John Lennon, October 9.
However, God had other plans for us. On my sixth month of pregnancy, my amniotic fluid level was not as high as it should be. It was still stubbornly low on my eighth month. Thus, on a Friday afternoon, 21 days after I turned 31, I was hospitalized for rehydration.And Despite the low fluid level in her uterine environment, my little girl was in a fighting form. My earlier ultrasound sessions showed her to be within the normal weight and length for her age. How proud and relieved I felt when her biophysical profile scores always turned out perfect. Not even having come out of my womb yet, my baby was already being graded.
By Sunday night, I had to be injected with drug X to strengthen my baby’s lungs, in preparation for premature birth. The next day, Monday morning of August 25, I still had a low fluid level. A little after noon, I transferred to a nearby hospital. Like a salmon going back to its breeding ground, I wanted to give birth in the hospital where my own mother gave birth to me.
When I was opened up, the doctors told me that my uterus was small. So small that my baby had to get out, to be free, as eight months in my womb are enough time for her to gestate. At 3PM, my baby girl, Luce Domini, was scooped out of my womb. She weighed just 2 kilos and measured 1-foot-5 inches; but her APGAR score was a high 9, remarkable for a prematurely-born infant. “Hello, baby,” I told her when the nurse showed her to me, swathed in hospital-green clothe, so small. Then I drifted to sleep, to be awakened by the Angelus as I was wheeled to my room.
It was not until 2 days later when I would see my baby again. To avoid possible complications, she didn’t room-in with me. Later that day, I held my baby in my arms for the first time.
Fast forward to summer 2009. My husband and I now have a young girl bursting with confidence and showing such negotiating skills, she usually ends up getting the better deal after most collective bargaining agreements.
At that time, she has been attending Kumon Reading sessions for three months. My little girl’s progress is summarized by a graph. Three more lines show advanced levels at one year, two years, or three years, where the child can receive bronze, silver, or gold medals for being ahead of her actual school level.
Luce and I would often look at her graph. That summer, we set goals for her. “Finish Level 2A before your birthday and you’d be getting a bronze,” I showed her.
I wanted her to learn to read, to enjoy the printed word as much as I do, or even more. Thus, I’ve surrounded Luce with books since she was a baby. In fact, I started reading to her in utero. Oh, I’d read to her the places she’d go; I’d tell her of Yertle the Turtle and Daisy McFuzz. Now, oh, the joy I feel, the pride that makes my heart swell when she reads to me the exploits of Cat in the hat, or the little red hen, or the house that Jack built.
I guess, like any mother, I want a mini version of me in my daughter. Since she’s undoubtedly her father’s daughter in looks, in humming to tunes, and in tapping to the rhythm, I explored other avenues to create a little Faye in my Luce.
As I guided my child towards enhancing her reading skills, I began contemplating on my own enhancement. There was my daughter, progressing towards a bronze medal before August ends. What about me? Towards what goal am I moving forward to? Am I moving in the first place? I didn’t think so.
Last summer, I felt stuck in the quagmire of self doubts. I felt immobile as my spirit was like a flat tire, devoid of air, no wind to life me up. I felt sad, tired, lost.
Yet my daughter, true to her name, Luce, light, she enlightened me. I once wrote a poem for my husband, referring to him as my north star, my lighthouse. Last summer, as I felt lost, adrift at sea, my daughter beamed her own light. Smaller than her father’s, yes. But as bright, as lively, as inspiring.
My little Luce, my little lighthouse, lighted my path. My little Luce, my young daughter, showed me the way. My little Luce, my very own child, gave birth to a new me.
I embarked on a new mission. Codename: Finding Faye.
I aimed to shed my old self and looked forward to seeing the new me. I bade goodbye to some scars, literally and figuratively, as I uncovered the real me. I started with a leg peeling treatment, followed by a writing workshop, and then a speech course. By the time my legs had been scrubbed clean of dermal debris, I have finally transformed a few ideas into several written pieces, and with enough confidence to pitch my written work to others.
Last month, I finally attended Butter N Toast sessions, a plan I have wanted to do since 2007. Like my daughter with her Kumon, I am now working towards a goal, towards becoming a CC after a year, towards becoming a CL a year after that. I turned 37 last August 1 and have just been born again. I see myself growing in Butter N Toast.
I have swept away the cobwebs in my mind, I have flexed my muscles into action. Here I am. I have found Faye.
And tonight, six years after I first held my baby girl in my arms, I stand before you and present my first speech. It is my hope that as tightly as I embraced my daughter that August night in the hospital nursery, you would equally accept me in your fold.
“A person’s name is the sweetest and most important sound in any language.” That is according to Dale Carnegie. For me, this is especially true because, while others collect things, awards, or hats, I collect names. I would like to tell you about the names and titles I’ve got so far.
Dilis
I am Dian Leithon Isidro. I was born on Dec. 26, 1974, 2nd in the brood of 4. According to my baby pictures, I was not the cutest baby in the neighborhood. My mother disagrees. My grandma agrees. My father cannot object.
I’m currently working as an IT professional. It’s a common practice in our industry to come up with a pseudonym to sign our work with, use as login names or name us in the virtual world. For instance, linux is attributed to Linus Torvalds. Mine is “dilis.” It’s the acronym of my full name. I have been using it from the time I took up computer science up to the present. This name is special to me because it embodies the inborn/raw/naked/unrefined me without the covering of success or failure, abilities or disabilities.
Siraniko
During my high school days, I was fascinated by things around me, and how they worked. I found a children’s DIY encyclopedia in our local library that further fueled this fascination. I would read them a lot, and sometimes, would build projects from it. These include electromagnets, telephones and Morse code machines, and motors (from paper clip motors, to my own design, that up to now is not working). I would secure the materials for these projects from defective appliances my father stashed in our house and sometimes buying them. The funds came from my measly allowance.
As I grew older, this insatiable curiosity also grew intense and I started tinkering and opening working appliances around the house. Sometimes I can put them back together, many times though, well, let’s just say I needed some help from my father, and sometimes from a trusted handyman. This lust for knowledge and my particular brand of “creativity” earned me the moniker “Siraniko” from my father. It may sound funny, or even derogatory, but for me, it’s one of the sweetest names I have ever been called. It represents my character during that moment in my life: inquisitive, resourceful, and bold.
Agaton
Reaching new highs is one of our life goals. Many of the heights I reached so far didn’t come easy. A lot of times, I need to invest a lot of effort and time. This time around, I wanted it fast and easy. So, in 2005, I joined a mountaineering club. Joining this club requires undergoing 3-month training, in which required skills such as mountain survival, climb planning and etiquette are taught and physical fitness is developed. The trainees will need to complete training climbs wherein the theories are applied hands-on.
On our last training climb, we scaled Mt. Amuyao. It stands 2700 masl (meters above sea level) and one of the highest mountains in the country. One of its distinct features is the almost vertical ascent that requires about 4-5 hours to assault. This roughly translates to “it is a difficult climb.”
This climb coincided with our company’s software release. Unfortunately, Murphy’s Law hits me: everything that can go wrong indeed went wrong. To cut the story short, I was late on our departure time, and this is first and, they say, the cause of eventual delays during the climb. We all ended up trekking at night which is one of the worst cases in climbing. And for this my name during the climb became Late-ton, with emphasis on ‘late’.
I was able to redeem myself when during our descent I was one of the first to arrive at our wash area. While it is a common perception that going down is easier, because of gravity’s help, than going up, because of gravity’s pull, it’s not always the case, especially for me who had a knee condition that time. Anyway, because of this feat, I earned another name: Agaton.
This name is meaningful to me because it not only represent my adventures on Mt. Amuyao, but also all the hardships, the discipline, and the perseverance I learned on my foray in the sport of mountaineering.
These are the names of the most important aspects of my being, the names that defined me. I still have other names to tell you my other names like Jani for Johnny Litton,but I know you’re all tired and need a good night sleep, so I’ll stop here.
Stay on Top and Keep It Coming. This is what the club has chosen as its theme for the year.
The phrase conjures up an interesting mix of images and meanings, from the sublime to the mundane, from the ethereal and down to the sensual. Such novelty somehow captures our identity as a club. No doubt, we are passionate learners and we are serious in our quest for personal growth and achievement. That's the reason why we earned the President's Distinguished Club for three consecutive years. Yet, we are also bunch of "funatics." We certainly know how to have fun. Just sit in and observe one of our post-meeting sessions at Starbucks, and you'll know what we mean, especially when one hears our conversations going unpredictably from intellectual to trivial - well, mostly the latter and maybe somewhere in between. Or just notice how we are touched, even inspired, by a lot of the speeches. But then, we also hear ocassional banterings which oddly defy both reason and convention for they spiced up our evening without leaving anyone hurt nor insulted. For a club that have seriously embraced a philosophy for unleashing human potential by building on the positive yet get away clean with those banterings, that sounds paradoxical. Well, it just shows two things. One, we have mastered the art of having fun while learning. Second, we just enjoy each other's company yet we know how to temper our brand of humor and fun with the respect and decency each member deserves.
The theme somehow captures not just who we are as a club but also where we think we are now. We believe that we are at the top of our game. Yet, we also know that the greater challenge for us is staying on top.
If this is a trip, I don’t think we just intend to stay overnight or for a couple of days. As a club, we think of ourselves as immigrants who aim for a permanent status in a high altitude residence called Excellence. No, we are not vacationers or tourists who just wander around aimlessly and then eventually leave later on. That’s the essence of what we mean by "Keep it Coming!" We recognize that complacency is the enemy of greatness. Hence, the club cannot rest on its past laurels. We need to continue building on what we have achieved and keep the achievements coming.
Our own Ed Ebreo has this to say about our theme, “The Keep It Coming part talks to the new leaders and the rest of the members to demonstrate leadership in whatever roles they play. Keep raising the bar. Keep pushing the envelope of excellence. It tells us to be accountable for the roles we play, to step up to the plate and deliver on our promise of performance. NOTHING LESS is expected…Being able to do this in BNT is like practicing to do it in one's life and career. BNT can be your best training ground for leadership in life.”
As we formally launch our theme for this term, we believe it’s a perfect time to revisit our goals and our roles here at BNT. Think about how you can continue climbing the never-ending ladder of excellence. That means delivering more speeches,
earning higher norms, or taking on more roles. And like what Boom and others are doing, you can even think of spreading the Toastmasters way to those who are interested .
Indeed, there’s a lot that we can do to stay on top. Just keep it coming! .