by Gege C. Sugue
Speech Project No. 3
Advanced Communication Series: Specialty Speeches
Who wants to be happy?
I guess most, if not all, of us want to be happy. So tonight, I'm selling tickets.
Tickets to happiness. No, this is not magic. This will not give you 185 million pesos instantly. It will not enable you to lose 20 pounds overnight. It will not help you find the man or woman of your dreams. It is not magic. Happiness is not achieved magically.
There is, however, a formula. It is a formula discovered by author Allan K. Chalmers, who said that there are three grand essentials of happiness and these are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.
Yes, this is tonight's special offer, something to do, something to love, and something to hope for, all packaged in one activity.
This activity is called Speechcraft. For those who are not familiar with it yet, Speechcraft is a program designed by Toastmasters International. It teaches through 3 or 4, or up to 8 sessions the rudiments of public speaking to members and non-members. Seasoned Toastmasters teach by sharing and showing. And the participants learn by doing.
BnT has had the opportunity to conduct the program for some corporations, but this particular Speechcraft project will be spearheaded by Division B as part of its Corporate Social Responsibility goals. Division B's mission is for Toastmasters to work together in projects that enable them to share their time, talent, knowledge, and heart so that underprivileged individuals can improve their communication skills and enjoy positive change in their lives.
So this project will not be for a corporation. Instead we'll be working with an NGO called ATD.
ATD, All Together in Dignity is an international organization working with the community to eradicate poverty from this planet. It's a group that does not believe in dole-outs. Their projects are those that give persons living with poverty a voice. We know that money talks. So the one without money can't be heard. ATD wants to change that through projects that allow the community members to speak through art, fora, livelihood projects, and other events that enable them to speak up, to share their experiences, their views, their aspirations.
The participants are not your usual participants -- corporate employees, yuppies -- but instead we will share our talents and skills with youth from underprivileged communities. Some of them were drug addicts, the type you see sniffing glue in the streets. Some of them engaged in petty crimes like pickpocketing. But they are willing to turn their lives around. And that's where we and Speechcraft come in.
This is also where Chalmer's formula comes in.
Let's talk about something to do. What's the major happening this year in our country? Yes, the elections. How many of you already have that one candidate in mind -- the one who will change things around, the one who will eradicate corruption, the one who will make poverty history, and lead us to a path of recovery and prosperity. Ah, I see only a few raised hands. And the rest? Uncertain? Some of us, I suspect, will probably end up voting for the one who is the "lesser evil." Some of us, like I am, must be so frustrated, feeling helpless, thinking, "what else can I do aside from voting for the lesser evil?"
Well, here's something you can do. Join me in one of the Saturdays of Speechcraft. Participate. Play a role. That's what you can do. As a Toastmaster, you can share what you know. Maybe it does not seem like much, the impact not of national import. But it will make a difference in the life of a person, who will otherwise not have a voice.
How about something to love? It is Valentine weekend. Love is in the air. And some of us are contemplating the meaning of love. What is love? Share with me your definitions.
Ah, cheesy definitions you have. I realized though, that I need not google cheesy love quotes to define love. The best definition of love comes from here: 1 John 4:8. God is love. This definition is further defined in the very popular verse, John 3:16. For God so loved the world that he gave His only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. God defiines love as giving, as sacrificing for the sake of others.
Look, I know that what I ask you is not easy. To wake up early on a Saturday morning and go all the way to Pandacan to teach people you don't know for no pay and hardly any glory.
And how can I even suggest that you love these people? Some of them may not be worth loving or some of them may be hard to love. Some of them may have picked your pocket or wrangled your phone away from you. But you know what, God loves us even when we're not worth loving. God loves us when we're ugly, stinky, and evil. Because to love is to give and to sacrifice. Here's an opportunity to love in the way that God loves.
The last element of the formula is something to hope for. I thought to myself that in this project, we are more the deliverers of hope rather than the receivers. But here's another perspective on hope as defined by President Barrack Obama, who says that that "hope is the belief that our destiny will not be written for us, but by us; by all those men and women who are not content to settle for the world as it is, but have the courage to remake the world as it should be."
Friends, do you envision a world of hope? Does your vision of the world as it should be include positive change for the youth? Does it involve action by doing something concrete? Does it include love?
If it does, then you need one of these tickets. It's a ticket to do, to love, and to hope. It's a ticket to happiness. But it does not come for free. First, you have to sign up. Sign up for one or more of these dates -- Feb. 27, March 6, April 10. Then you have to show up. Show up from 9 AM to 12 noon of those dates. Then, you have to speak up. Deliver a speech. Take on a role. That's the price -- Sign up. Show up. Speak up so that others may speak too.
Let me close this presentation with a story, the story of a woman who lost her husband and her son at the same time. Such tragic events could rob anyone of happiness forever. And try as she might, none of her possessions, her friends, her diversions could make her happy. Until one day she came home and saw her son's puppy. Since her son's death, the puppy has been neglected, left hungry and lonely. She took pity on the dog and fed it, bathed it, and gave it a hug. Only then when she felt the puppy hug her back, rub against her with appreciation did she feel a tinge of happiness again. And she thought to herself that if doing that could make her happy, what else can she do? The next day she brought cookies to her neighbors. The day after that she brought food and clothes to the community center. She spent her days giving, sacrificing, loving, and she learned that you don't earn happiness by looking for it. You find it by giving it away.
So, happiness anyone?
Showing posts with label Gege Sugue. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gege Sugue. Show all posts
Friday, February 19, 2010
Monday, February 01, 2010
Strike a Conversation; There's Nothing to It.
Speech Delivered by Gege C. Sugue
Speech Project One: Conversing with Ease
Advance Speech Manual: Interpersonal Communication
Time: 10 to 14 minutes
Objectives of the Speech:
Good evening, fellow toastmasters. Good evening, guests, or as I like to call you, new friends. Talking about new friends, let me take a poll about the kind of socializers we have here in this room. In every social gathering -- a party, seminar, meeting -- there are 2 types of people. One group I call the friendsters, and another the shysters. A friendster is one who is comfortable entering a room full of strangers, making friends, and by the end of the evening, he has 125 business cards and one of his new-found friends has invited him to be a godson to his first born. Who among you is a friendster? (Show of hands) I admire you because I'm from the other group. The shysters.
Shysters, don't be shy, raise your hands. Shysters are uncomfortable, even scared, making new friends. Though I usually have the courage to go alone to social events, when I get there and I'm confronted with a sea of strangers, I get intimidated, anxious, and I start looking for familiar, friendly faces. It takes a while for me to warm up. Or that's why I always volunteer to be an organizer, so I have an excuse to approach people officially.
That is why this project has been helpful to me. This Toastmasters manual shares techniques for striking conversations with strangers. And I'm sharing these with you. To help you remember, let me share the EASE approach.
Ease into the conversation.
Ask open-ended questions.
Sincerely listen.
Equip yourself.
Ease into the Conversation. Don't set silly goals like wowing people with your charming wit or persuading them you're the best in anything. Start light and easy. This reminds me of college parties. One of those college parties was held at our home. And my then 6-year-old brother would go to my friends and start the conversation with, "What do you think of levitation?" That freaked out my friends and confirmed what they suspected all along, that I come from a weird family. That is NOT the way to ease into a conversation.
According to the manual, there are 4 levels of conversation. The first level is Small Talk. Small, chewable, easily processed bits of conversation. Stay within topics that most people can relate to. Avoid controversy and opinions. That's why the weather is a favorite topic for small talk -- everyone can relate to it, and hardly anyone will be offended when you talk about the nice, nippy weather we've been experiencing lately. Or you can talk about the event or the venue -- "I love the decor here." And the best way to start a conversation is with a sincere compliment -- "I've been admiring your necklace; it goes very well with your outfit."
The second level involves Fact Disclosure. You can share general details about your job. Or for the ladies, maybe you can mention that you are married -- "My husband enjoys golf too." Of course, you need to be judicious about the facts you disclose. It's not the time to share your passwords and salary level. Steer clear of divisive or sensitive topics like sex, religion, and politics unless the event calls for it and circumstances allow it.
When you both get more comfortable, you can move on to the 3rd level and start sharing Viewpoints and Opinions. You can share your stand on certain issues. You can talk about likes and dislikes. And when asked, you can voice your opinions. But still make sure you don't offend; be diplomatic. Tread carefully. Don't insult any personality; you never know if the other person is related to the person you're insulting.
And only at level four can you share your Personal Feelings. Not everybody needs to get to this level, but if you connect well with the other person, then you can share your more intimate sentiments. But still keep it positive. Talk about your passions, the things that make you happy or positively excited.
A conversation can go from level 1 to level 4 in a matter of minutes, or maybe it would take more than 1 meeting. Just make sure to ease through the levels. Do not leapfrog from level 1 to level 4, skipping the other steps -- "Hi, I'm Juan Smith, and I'm afraid I might have contracted syphilis in my last foreign trip." Ease into the conversation.
The next tip is to Ask Open Ended Questions. Oftentimes, we struggle dealing with strangers because we're too self-conscious. We worry about sounding silly, looking stupid, committing a social faux pas. No wonder we're so nervous. The way to deal with that is deflect the attention to others. Focus on the other person so you don't worry about yourself. Ask them questions. Let them talk, so they will be the ones to say something silly. ;) It helps to ask open ended questions, questions that begin with why, what, how. This gives them an opportunity to share more information and opinions.
When you ask questions, you make sure you Sincerely Listen. Again, I remember teenage parties way back when it was still normal for guys to come and ask girls to dance. In the middle of the dance floor, while C'mon Feel the Noise is playing, attempts at striking conversations usually end up as major failures because even when you ask a question, you don't really hear the answers. Worse than external noise, however, is internal noise. Set aside other concerns that may distract you. Do not worry about how you look or sound. Listen sincerely, actively. Listen with your ears to the words. Listen with your eyes through eye contact. Check if the words are in congruence with the facial expressions. Use body language -- lean forward, nod attentively and appropriately. Laugh and react at the right time. Sincerely be interested in the other person, and you can engage better and converse with more ease.
Lastly, Equip Yourself. Build in yourself an interesting personality by being aware of hot topics that other people might be interested in. Do your research -- read books and magazines; watch TV; and scan the internet. Be abreast of current events and form opinions and stands on certain issues. You never know when you have to strike a conversation that can boost your career or improve your life.
Just remember that conversations can be EASEy. Style and confidence guru Madonna says, 'Strike a pose; there's nothing to it." I say, it's easy. Strike a conversation; there's nothing to it."
Speech Project One: Conversing with Ease
Advance Speech Manual: Interpersonal Communication
Time: 10 to 14 minutes
Objectives of the Speech:
- Identify techniques to use in conversing with strangers
- Recognize different levels of conversation
- Initiate a conversation with a stranger
- Use open-ended questions to solicit information for further conversation
Good evening, fellow toastmasters. Good evening, guests, or as I like to call you, new friends. Talking about new friends, let me take a poll about the kind of socializers we have here in this room. In every social gathering -- a party, seminar, meeting -- there are 2 types of people. One group I call the friendsters, and another the shysters. A friendster is one who is comfortable entering a room full of strangers, making friends, and by the end of the evening, he has 125 business cards and one of his new-found friends has invited him to be a godson to his first born. Who among you is a friendster? (Show of hands) I admire you because I'm from the other group. The shysters.
Shysters, don't be shy, raise your hands. Shysters are uncomfortable, even scared, making new friends. Though I usually have the courage to go alone to social events, when I get there and I'm confronted with a sea of strangers, I get intimidated, anxious, and I start looking for familiar, friendly faces. It takes a while for me to warm up. Or that's why I always volunteer to be an organizer, so I have an excuse to approach people officially.
That is why this project has been helpful to me. This Toastmasters manual shares techniques for striking conversations with strangers. And I'm sharing these with you. To help you remember, let me share the EASE approach.
Ease into the conversation.
Ask open-ended questions.
Sincerely listen.
Equip yourself.
Ease into the Conversation. Don't set silly goals like wowing people with your charming wit or persuading them you're the best in anything. Start light and easy. This reminds me of college parties. One of those college parties was held at our home. And my then 6-year-old brother would go to my friends and start the conversation with, "What do you think of levitation?" That freaked out my friends and confirmed what they suspected all along, that I come from a weird family. That is NOT the way to ease into a conversation.
According to the manual, there are 4 levels of conversation. The first level is Small Talk. Small, chewable, easily processed bits of conversation. Stay within topics that most people can relate to. Avoid controversy and opinions. That's why the weather is a favorite topic for small talk -- everyone can relate to it, and hardly anyone will be offended when you talk about the nice, nippy weather we've been experiencing lately. Or you can talk about the event or the venue -- "I love the decor here." And the best way to start a conversation is with a sincere compliment -- "I've been admiring your necklace; it goes very well with your outfit."
The second level involves Fact Disclosure. You can share general details about your job. Or for the ladies, maybe you can mention that you are married -- "My husband enjoys golf too." Of course, you need to be judicious about the facts you disclose. It's not the time to share your passwords and salary level. Steer clear of divisive or sensitive topics like sex, religion, and politics unless the event calls for it and circumstances allow it.
When you both get more comfortable, you can move on to the 3rd level and start sharing Viewpoints and Opinions. You can share your stand on certain issues. You can talk about likes and dislikes. And when asked, you can voice your opinions. But still make sure you don't offend; be diplomatic. Tread carefully. Don't insult any personality; you never know if the other person is related to the person you're insulting.
And only at level four can you share your Personal Feelings. Not everybody needs to get to this level, but if you connect well with the other person, then you can share your more intimate sentiments. But still keep it positive. Talk about your passions, the things that make you happy or positively excited.
A conversation can go from level 1 to level 4 in a matter of minutes, or maybe it would take more than 1 meeting. Just make sure to ease through the levels. Do not leapfrog from level 1 to level 4, skipping the other steps -- "Hi, I'm Juan Smith, and I'm afraid I might have contracted syphilis in my last foreign trip." Ease into the conversation.
The next tip is to Ask Open Ended Questions. Oftentimes, we struggle dealing with strangers because we're too self-conscious. We worry about sounding silly, looking stupid, committing a social faux pas. No wonder we're so nervous. The way to deal with that is deflect the attention to others. Focus on the other person so you don't worry about yourself. Ask them questions. Let them talk, so they will be the ones to say something silly. ;) It helps to ask open ended questions, questions that begin with why, what, how. This gives them an opportunity to share more information and opinions.
When you ask questions, you make sure you Sincerely Listen. Again, I remember teenage parties way back when it was still normal for guys to come and ask girls to dance. In the middle of the dance floor, while C'mon Feel the Noise is playing, attempts at striking conversations usually end up as major failures because even when you ask a question, you don't really hear the answers. Worse than external noise, however, is internal noise. Set aside other concerns that may distract you. Do not worry about how you look or sound. Listen sincerely, actively. Listen with your ears to the words. Listen with your eyes through eye contact. Check if the words are in congruence with the facial expressions. Use body language -- lean forward, nod attentively and appropriately. Laugh and react at the right time. Sincerely be interested in the other person, and you can engage better and converse with more ease.
Lastly, Equip Yourself. Build in yourself an interesting personality by being aware of hot topics that other people might be interested in. Do your research -- read books and magazines; watch TV; and scan the internet. Be abreast of current events and form opinions and stands on certain issues. You never know when you have to strike a conversation that can boost your career or improve your life.
Just remember that conversations can be EASEy. Style and confidence guru Madonna says, 'Strike a pose; there's nothing to it." I say, it's easy. Strike a conversation; there's nothing to it."
Friday, September 25, 2009
Three People I Met at Toastmasters
Opening Remarks at the Officer Installation and New Member Induction
Speaker: Gege Sugue
Speech Project: Uplift the Spirit from the Specialty Speeches Manual
Time: 8 to 10 minutes
Good evening, Pat, Jun, (the missing Alvin Tan), Shel, Christian, (the absent Christine), Sheila, Boom. Congratulations for accepting the challenge and the responsibilities of leadership of this club. I salute you for your courage and commitment.
Good evening, Toastmasters. Your being here tonight is also an indication of your commitment to and faith in the Toastmasters organization.
Much has been said about the benefits that the Toastmasters organization offers its members. One of the least harped about of these benefits is the fact that you meet a lot of people. And I don't mean that in a networking kind of way; it's not just about expanding your business contacts. I mean we meet different types of interesting, engaging people. Some of them become your friends. Some become your mentors, or tormentors, or all of the above. I've met a lot of people who have encouraged me, inspired me, and taught me lessons.
I only have time to talk about 3 of them. These 3 have taught me 3 lessons that have been useful in my stints as officer of this club.
One of them was Mar Sy. For those who did not have the privilege of knowing Mar, he was one of the charter members of the club. That means he was one of those who had the vision for a community of human resource practitioners learning and developing together. From day one of this club, he was an active participant of the club, shaping this club to be what it is now.
I met and got to know Mar here at Toastmasters. And he taught me to seize the day.
I'll be honest. Mar was not a cookie-cutter type leader. No leader-like demeanor; no gregarious, extroverted personality. He was rather shy, laid-back, soft spoken. But he did not let his shyness stop him from answering the call to lead. He was a charter officer. And on his second year in Toastmasters, he was an Area Governor.
I wouldn't also consider him a natural born speaker. Like most of us, he really needed Toastmasters to bring out the speaker in him. But did he let his limitations stop him? No, he grabbed every opportunity to speak and to develop his speaking skills. He didn't miss any opportunity to participate in Table Topics as either speaker or host. Who knows how much more he would have grown as a speaker given the chance.
Unfortunately, death robbed him of that chance. However tragic that loss may be, for me it has served the purpose of reminding me to seize the day. Not to waste opportunities. Not to let moments for growth pass me by.
Last term when I was the president of this club, that was the longest year of my life. One full year, 525,600 minutes of thinking, talking, breathing Toastmasters. A year divided into segments of 2 weeks, the first part of which spent on planning the meeting, and the last 2 days of which fixing up the messed up plans because speakers backed out and evaluators canceled.
It was the longest year of my life. But it was also the shortest. Because at the end of it, when the leadership was wrestled away from me (insert smile here) I still haven't had enough. Still a lot of unfinished business. Things I should have done but didn't. But I had to move on, because as Mars has shown me with his life and his premature death, time is valuable, and the day is there for me to do more and be more. I will seize the day. I will grab every opportunity to lead, learn, and live life to the fullest.
The second person I met in Toastmasters is Michelle Lim, the founding president of this club.
John Maxwell said that the arena where one can truly challenge and develop one's leadership is in volunteerism. Because the members are not paid. Because they are not beholden to any boss and their careers are not at stake if they mess up. Toastmasters is such an environment. Everyone is free to join and leave. So a leader needs to know how to charm, coerce, communicate to lead and motivate.
Maxwell also stresses the importance of communication skills to lead.
Michelle is the embodiment of that twin pairing of leadership and communication. Communication skills ooze from her pores. She inspires with a vision. She motivates, encourages, mentors. She did such a great job of leading this club that on its first year, with just 9 months to do it, she led us to achieving Select Distinguished Club status. And a huge part of the time, she was out of the country. That's leadership.
Michelle is a good leader because she can talk, and she can walk the talk. What she has taught me is to lead the way. She does not pressure members to deliver speeches. She shows us by delivering speech after speech after speech. She earns a minimum of 2 norms a year. So, when I was president, I tried to follow her example. I wanted the members to deliver speeches, so I delivered speeches, and earned my Advanced Communicator Bronze as a reward. I wanted people to work on their Competent Leader Manual. So even if I did not have to do it, because I was already aiming for Silver, I still did. Because Michelle showed me that that was the way to lead to the way.
Dear officers, there is no avoiding it. Lead the way. Tell us why and then show us how.
And now, on to the third person.
I truly think that the most difficult post in Toastmasters is that of VP Education, and this person has been VP Education 1 1/2 times, the 1/2 being when he took over when Mar could no longer attend the club meetings. Being VP Education can make or break you.
It almost broke this man. Every other week, he would feel like killing himself as he worked on the cumbersome Program. I saw him wanting to gouge his eyes as he worked on a multicolored matrix, size 6 font, trying to schedule the roles and speakers. And in the end, no one even used that matrix.
But did he break? Nah.
Did he come to the meetings, bitter at the no-shows, angry at being VP Ed? No, Ed Ebreo, with bandaged wrists and red-shot eyes came ready to have the best meeting possible. Ed is right; meetings without him are just not as fun. He reminds me all the time that BnT is about fun, about learning in an environment of fun. He reminds me of celebrating victories and laughing at miseries. He was always willing to be the butt of jokes, all for the sake of having fun at Toastmasters meetings. He taught me the 3rd lesson of leadership -- make it look like play.
Ed makes leadership look so easy that last term, we had an unprecedented number of people wanting to be officers. They wrestled the gavel away from us, wanting to be the new officers, wanting to lead.
And so here you are -- our new, spanking officers. The people who will lead this club to higher levels of excellence and achievement.
As I turn this gavel over to you, I challenge you.
Learn and apply the 3 lessons I learned from the 3 people I met. Listen to Mar, Michelle, and Ed. This is your chance to:
Seize the day.
Lead the way.
Make it look like play.
It's your chance to make a difference and help others become better leaders and communicators.
It's your time to inspire. So that by May 2010, you will have a new set of eager officer-wanna be's, raising their hands, shouting, me! me! choose me! I want to lead.
I know you'll do well. And I am hear to support you. I promise. And I seal that promise by banging this gavel and saying for the last time, as outgoing President of Butter N Toast Toastmasters Club, I now call this meeting to order.
Speaker: Gege Sugue
Speech Project: Uplift the Spirit from the Specialty Speeches Manual
Time: 8 to 10 minutes
Good evening, Pat, Jun, (the missing Alvin Tan), Shel, Christian, (the absent Christine), Sheila, Boom. Congratulations for accepting the challenge and the responsibilities of leadership of this club. I salute you for your courage and commitment.
Good evening, Toastmasters. Your being here tonight is also an indication of your commitment to and faith in the Toastmasters organization.
Much has been said about the benefits that the Toastmasters organization offers its members. One of the least harped about of these benefits is the fact that you meet a lot of people. And I don't mean that in a networking kind of way; it's not just about expanding your business contacts. I mean we meet different types of interesting, engaging people. Some of them become your friends. Some become your mentors, or tormentors, or all of the above. I've met a lot of people who have encouraged me, inspired me, and taught me lessons.
I only have time to talk about 3 of them. These 3 have taught me 3 lessons that have been useful in my stints as officer of this club.
One of them was Mar Sy. For those who did not have the privilege of knowing Mar, he was one of the charter members of the club. That means he was one of those who had the vision for a community of human resource practitioners learning and developing together. From day one of this club, he was an active participant of the club, shaping this club to be what it is now.
I met and got to know Mar here at Toastmasters. And he taught me to seize the day.
I'll be honest. Mar was not a cookie-cutter type leader. No leader-like demeanor; no gregarious, extroverted personality. He was rather shy, laid-back, soft spoken. But he did not let his shyness stop him from answering the call to lead. He was a charter officer. And on his second year in Toastmasters, he was an Area Governor.
I wouldn't also consider him a natural born speaker. Like most of us, he really needed Toastmasters to bring out the speaker in him. But did he let his limitations stop him? No, he grabbed every opportunity to speak and to develop his speaking skills. He didn't miss any opportunity to participate in Table Topics as either speaker or host. Who knows how much more he would have grown as a speaker given the chance.
Unfortunately, death robbed him of that chance. However tragic that loss may be, for me it has served the purpose of reminding me to seize the day. Not to waste opportunities. Not to let moments for growth pass me by.
Last term when I was the president of this club, that was the longest year of my life. One full year, 525,600 minutes of thinking, talking, breathing Toastmasters. A year divided into segments of 2 weeks, the first part of which spent on planning the meeting, and the last 2 days of which fixing up the messed up plans because speakers backed out and evaluators canceled.
It was the longest year of my life. But it was also the shortest. Because at the end of it, when the leadership was wrestled away from me (insert smile here) I still haven't had enough. Still a lot of unfinished business. Things I should have done but didn't. But I had to move on, because as Mars has shown me with his life and his premature death, time is valuable, and the day is there for me to do more and be more. I will seize the day. I will grab every opportunity to lead, learn, and live life to the fullest.
The second person I met in Toastmasters is Michelle Lim, the founding president of this club.
John Maxwell said that the arena where one can truly challenge and develop one's leadership is in volunteerism. Because the members are not paid. Because they are not beholden to any boss and their careers are not at stake if they mess up. Toastmasters is such an environment. Everyone is free to join and leave. So a leader needs to know how to charm, coerce, communicate to lead and motivate.
Maxwell also stresses the importance of communication skills to lead.
Michelle is the embodiment of that twin pairing of leadership and communication. Communication skills ooze from her pores. She inspires with a vision. She motivates, encourages, mentors. She did such a great job of leading this club that on its first year, with just 9 months to do it, she led us to achieving Select Distinguished Club status. And a huge part of the time, she was out of the country. That's leadership.
Michelle is a good leader because she can talk, and she can walk the talk. What she has taught me is to lead the way. She does not pressure members to deliver speeches. She shows us by delivering speech after speech after speech. She earns a minimum of 2 norms a year. So, when I was president, I tried to follow her example. I wanted the members to deliver speeches, so I delivered speeches, and earned my Advanced Communicator Bronze as a reward. I wanted people to work on their Competent Leader Manual. So even if I did not have to do it, because I was already aiming for Silver, I still did. Because Michelle showed me that that was the way to lead to the way.
Dear officers, there is no avoiding it. Lead the way. Tell us why and then show us how.
And now, on to the third person.
I truly think that the most difficult post in Toastmasters is that of VP Education, and this person has been VP Education 1 1/2 times, the 1/2 being when he took over when Mar could no longer attend the club meetings. Being VP Education can make or break you.
It almost broke this man. Every other week, he would feel like killing himself as he worked on the cumbersome Program. I saw him wanting to gouge his eyes as he worked on a multicolored matrix, size 6 font, trying to schedule the roles and speakers. And in the end, no one even used that matrix.
But did he break? Nah.
Did he come to the meetings, bitter at the no-shows, angry at being VP Ed? No, Ed Ebreo, with bandaged wrists and red-shot eyes came ready to have the best meeting possible. Ed is right; meetings without him are just not as fun. He reminds me all the time that BnT is about fun, about learning in an environment of fun. He reminds me of celebrating victories and laughing at miseries. He was always willing to be the butt of jokes, all for the sake of having fun at Toastmasters meetings. He taught me the 3rd lesson of leadership -- make it look like play.
Ed makes leadership look so easy that last term, we had an unprecedented number of people wanting to be officers. They wrestled the gavel away from us, wanting to be the new officers, wanting to lead.
And so here you are -- our new, spanking officers. The people who will lead this club to higher levels of excellence and achievement.
As I turn this gavel over to you, I challenge you.
Learn and apply the 3 lessons I learned from the 3 people I met. Listen to Mar, Michelle, and Ed. This is your chance to:
Seize the day.
Lead the way.
Make it look like play.
It's your chance to make a difference and help others become better leaders and communicators.
It's your time to inspire. So that by May 2010, you will have a new set of eager officer-wanna be's, raising their hands, shouting, me! me! choose me! I want to lead.
I know you'll do well. And I am hear to support you. I promise. And I seal that promise by banging this gavel and saying for the last time, as outgoing President of Butter N Toast Toastmasters Club, I now call this meeting to order.
Friday, October 27, 2006
An Experiment in Giving – Basic Speech #7 (Applying Your Skills)
by Gege C. Sugue
This “impromptu prepared” speech is an experimentation in giving. The inspiration for this is the article in our newsletter that was written by medical Doctor Morton Orman.
Dr. Orman prescribes solutions to the fear of public speaking by giving 10 principles to keep in mind. Two of these principles struck me where it hurt.
Principle no. 9 talks about the concept of over-preparation and how it can make our speeches worse. Principle no. 4 states that the main purpose of public speaking is giving.
My system rebelled against these two principles. They seemed to be anti-theses to my own public speaking principles.
Why is this doctor knocking preparation? I love preparation. For me, it is a requisite to success. And I make sure I invest time in preparing for my speeches and training workshops. I research diligently, prepare voluminous high-impact slides, polish my notes, and prepare a full-on word-by-word script for my delivery. I rehearse obessively, and then when I deliver I give it my all. I hate it when I get something wrong. I castigate myself when I forget something. I can be really unforgiving to myself.
And now, I need to grapple with the idea that maybe I prepare too much. So tonight’s speech is the experimentation. I stand here, two weeks premature for my scheduled speech, 8 hours after deciding I’m going to take the free speaking slot, no script, just a hastily scrawled outline. This experimentation will prove or disprove Dr. Orman’s theory.
Yet, I have to ask my evaluator, Ed, to still judge me based on the manual.
Because I am not endorsing mediocrity or substandard performance. I want to see this principle work. I am the last person to encourage you not to prepare. Preparation is our responsibility to our audience, our clients, the people and companies we represent. But preparation is meant to liberate us, give us confidence, enable us to deliver speeches and training programs with sheer joy.
Preparation is not meant to enslave us to perfection.
As to Dr. Orman’s idea that public speaking is about giving something of value to your audience, rather than getting something out of the deal, it’s a new way of thinking for me. For me, public speaking is about getting paid to do a good job. It’s about achieving excellence. Being the best. Having outstanding evaluations. It’s about impressing the audience.
And then two days ago, I had to train a group of Persons With Disabilities (PWD). And as I was preparing for the workshop, I realized I could not use most of the interactive gimmicks I had in mind, because of the participants’ physical limitations. I also had to keep the lessons basic to help those whose language proficiency is rudimentary.
No gimmicks, just the basics – these restrictions forced me to take a hard look at the program I was developing. And then it dawned on me that I am teaching these people to write letters, proposals, reports, not so they can prepare glossy brochures, or so that they can increase their profit and grow to be a top 500 company. These learners need to write letters and proposals that can enable blind people to work for more than one day a week, or help a person in a wheelchair get from Cubao to Makati in a wheelchair. So as I started the training day, I prayed. Normally, I would pray, “Lord, help me do this job well.” This time, my prayer was, “Lord help me help these learners learn something that will make their lives better.”
Normally, I’d end a training day tired, with just enough energy to wait for the praise. Sometimes I’d get the praise I crave for, and I’d get an emotional high. Sometimes, I would get a rather cold response and I would feel depressed. Either way, I would be physically spent, exhausted. But last Tuesday, when I trained to give, not to get, I finished the day, fulfilled, energetic, and emotionally rewarded.
The experiment worked.
So the two main points of this speech are these: One is that preparation is our friend, not the enemy that slaves us. Two, public speaking is not about getting praise, respect, fame, money. It is about giving something of value to your audience.
There are two things I encourage you, then, to do.
The first one, in one word is: Speak!
You have something to say that is of value to someone. Speak up. You have what it takes – your voice, your body, your mind – the 3 components that enable you to express yourselves. And in Toastmasters, you are given ample talk time. Don’t waste these opportunities. Speak. Do not worry about getting it perfect. Do not be afraid of messing up. Share what is in your heart. Don’t stay in your little corner whining about how bad this world, this life is. Move yourself. And move others with your ideas. Just speak.
The second thing I want you to do is this: Let other people speak.
Last night I had a conversation that revealed to me just how cruelly unfair, uneven, the public speaking playing field is. Some of us, and I consider myself one of those, are just blessed. Blessed with wealth, education, social privilege, travel opportunities, and so we’ve grown to be articulate, comfortable, confident in speaking a foreign language.
Some are just plain gifted, with fathers and grandfathers who were orators, politicians, writers, and educators. So the communication genes run through them.
But some just do not have all the breaks. Some come from environments where speaking is not encouraged. Some were educated by teachers who cannot even speak one grammatically correct sentence. Some have funny intonations, regional accents. Some are timid because they have been told they are not good enough and their opinions don't matter. Some have too much excess energy that drives them to over gesticulate.
But so what? These do not disqualify them from the right to speak. I urge you to let them speak.
Yes, we have standards. But standards are meant to help us set visions for self-improvement. They are meant for us to help others become better. They are not meant to be use for judging who can speak and who cannot, who can start a Toastmasters Club and who should not.
ATD, All Together for Development, is an NGO. They do not give out money, nor relief goods. They provide the venue for the poorest of the poor, the ones with the least power and the smallest voice, to speak out. Aling Tita, who is so poor she lives in a cemetery, was given a chance to speak in New York to an audience that included UN Director General, Kofi Anam. I don’t know what she said. I don’t know if her grammar was perfect or her diction was correct. But her speech moved Kofi Anam to tears. And I am willing to bet he was moved not by a grammatically correct speech, but by a message that came from the heart.
Friends, I encourage you to speak. It's your right, privilege, gift. It's your responsibility. And more importantly, open your eyes, ears, hearts, minds, and please let other people speak.
This “impromptu prepared” speech is an experimentation in giving. The inspiration for this is the article in our newsletter that was written by medical Doctor Morton Orman.
Dr. Orman prescribes solutions to the fear of public speaking by giving 10 principles to keep in mind. Two of these principles struck me where it hurt.
Principle no. 9 talks about the concept of over-preparation and how it can make our speeches worse. Principle no. 4 states that the main purpose of public speaking is giving.
My system rebelled against these two principles. They seemed to be anti-theses to my own public speaking principles.
Why is this doctor knocking preparation? I love preparation. For me, it is a requisite to success. And I make sure I invest time in preparing for my speeches and training workshops. I research diligently, prepare voluminous high-impact slides, polish my notes, and prepare a full-on word-by-word script for my delivery. I rehearse obessively, and then when I deliver I give it my all. I hate it when I get something wrong. I castigate myself when I forget something. I can be really unforgiving to myself.
And now, I need to grapple with the idea that maybe I prepare too much. So tonight’s speech is the experimentation. I stand here, two weeks premature for my scheduled speech, 8 hours after deciding I’m going to take the free speaking slot, no script, just a hastily scrawled outline. This experimentation will prove or disprove Dr. Orman’s theory.
Yet, I have to ask my evaluator, Ed, to still judge me based on the manual.
Because I am not endorsing mediocrity or substandard performance. I want to see this principle work. I am the last person to encourage you not to prepare. Preparation is our responsibility to our audience, our clients, the people and companies we represent. But preparation is meant to liberate us, give us confidence, enable us to deliver speeches and training programs with sheer joy.
Preparation is not meant to enslave us to perfection.
As to Dr. Orman’s idea that public speaking is about giving something of value to your audience, rather than getting something out of the deal, it’s a new way of thinking for me. For me, public speaking is about getting paid to do a good job. It’s about achieving excellence. Being the best. Having outstanding evaluations. It’s about impressing the audience.
And then two days ago, I had to train a group of Persons With Disabilities (PWD). And as I was preparing for the workshop, I realized I could not use most of the interactive gimmicks I had in mind, because of the participants’ physical limitations. I also had to keep the lessons basic to help those whose language proficiency is rudimentary.
No gimmicks, just the basics – these restrictions forced me to take a hard look at the program I was developing. And then it dawned on me that I am teaching these people to write letters, proposals, reports, not so they can prepare glossy brochures, or so that they can increase their profit and grow to be a top 500 company. These learners need to write letters and proposals that can enable blind people to work for more than one day a week, or help a person in a wheelchair get from Cubao to Makati in a wheelchair. So as I started the training day, I prayed. Normally, I would pray, “Lord, help me do this job well.” This time, my prayer was, “Lord help me help these learners learn something that will make their lives better.”
Normally, I’d end a training day tired, with just enough energy to wait for the praise. Sometimes I’d get the praise I crave for, and I’d get an emotional high. Sometimes, I would get a rather cold response and I would feel depressed. Either way, I would be physically spent, exhausted. But last Tuesday, when I trained to give, not to get, I finished the day, fulfilled, energetic, and emotionally rewarded.
The experiment worked.
So the two main points of this speech are these: One is that preparation is our friend, not the enemy that slaves us. Two, public speaking is not about getting praise, respect, fame, money. It is about giving something of value to your audience.
There are two things I encourage you, then, to do.
The first one, in one word is: Speak!
You have something to say that is of value to someone. Speak up. You have what it takes – your voice, your body, your mind – the 3 components that enable you to express yourselves. And in Toastmasters, you are given ample talk time. Don’t waste these opportunities. Speak. Do not worry about getting it perfect. Do not be afraid of messing up. Share what is in your heart. Don’t stay in your little corner whining about how bad this world, this life is. Move yourself. And move others with your ideas. Just speak.
The second thing I want you to do is this: Let other people speak.
Last night I had a conversation that revealed to me just how cruelly unfair, uneven, the public speaking playing field is. Some of us, and I consider myself one of those, are just blessed. Blessed with wealth, education, social privilege, travel opportunities, and so we’ve grown to be articulate, comfortable, confident in speaking a foreign language.
Some are just plain gifted, with fathers and grandfathers who were orators, politicians, writers, and educators. So the communication genes run through them.
But some just do not have all the breaks. Some come from environments where speaking is not encouraged. Some were educated by teachers who cannot even speak one grammatically correct sentence. Some have funny intonations, regional accents. Some are timid because they have been told they are not good enough and their opinions don't matter. Some have too much excess energy that drives them to over gesticulate.
But so what? These do not disqualify them from the right to speak. I urge you to let them speak.
Yes, we have standards. But standards are meant to help us set visions for self-improvement. They are meant for us to help others become better. They are not meant to be use for judging who can speak and who cannot, who can start a Toastmasters Club and who should not.
ATD, All Together for Development, is an NGO. They do not give out money, nor relief goods. They provide the venue for the poorest of the poor, the ones with the least power and the smallest voice, to speak out. Aling Tita, who is so poor she lives in a cemetery, was given a chance to speak in New York to an audience that included UN Director General, Kofi Anam. I don’t know what she said. I don’t know if her grammar was perfect or her diction was correct. But her speech moved Kofi Anam to tears. And I am willing to bet he was moved not by a grammatically correct speech, but by a message that came from the heart.
Friends, I encourage you to speak. It's your right, privilege, gift. It's your responsibility. And more importantly, open your eyes, ears, hearts, minds, and please let other people speak.
Friday, October 20, 2006
Winning with Words - Basic Speech #6 (Working with Words)
by Gege Sugue
(Darkness)
Booming Voice: Let there be light! (Turn on lights.)
With 4 little words, the world began. Such is the power of words.
We do not have to be God to wield words of power. Every day, mortals like us speak words that have the power to make things happen, to change our lives and the lives of others.
One of the richest, wisest kings who ever walked the earth once said, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue.” (Prov 18:21) The words of our mouth have the power to kill and the power to give life.
Take the story of Kate Couric, CBS evening news anchor and managing editor. In fourth grade, a teacher scolded her in front of the class and told her in disgust, “Katie, you smile too much.” Those words embarrassed her and almost killed the spirit behind that smile. She carried those words and the unease in her mind and her heart the whole day. It’s a good thing that that night, she was able to talk to her father who uttered words that she would remember for the rest of her life. Her father said, “Just use her words to your advantage.” And so she followed her father’s advice. When she ran for student council presidency, she started her speech by saying, “Hello. My name is Katie Couric. People wonder why I am always smiling. It’s because I am happy. Happy to go to such a wonderful school. Yes, Jamestown is a wonderful school and I’d like to keep it that way.” Her father’s words gave life to Katie Couric’s dreams.
Even as an adult, Katie remembered her father’s words. These words have helped her time and again throughout her life. And now, as the first female solo anchor of a major TV network evening newscast in the United States, she certainly has a lot more to smile about.
Ladies and Gentlemen, our words have power. Think back to when you were a kid, playing and running around. And your mom would shout, Oh, you’re going to fall! And true enough a minute later, you will be down on your knees. The power of words.
Before we set about doing anything, we always verbalize it first. We tell ourselves or someone else, “I’m going to have the cheeseburger.” Or I’m going to have a haircut this weekend.” “I’m going to bungee jump.” I’m going to marry this woman.” “No matter how busy I am, I’m going to prepare this speech and deliver 1 speech a month so I can be a Competent Communicator by yearend.” “I’m going to sit here and mope because I’m depressed.” Chances are, we will do exactly what we say we’ll do.”
The apostle James compared our tongue to the little rudder that directs a big ship. The words we say will determine the direction and orientation of our lives. The power of our words can bring us to the next level of success or limit us from getting anywhere, or worse, even doom us to failure. So watch your words. If you keep telling yourself, you’re a loser, then you can bet on it – you will lose. As for me, I start my days saying, “I can do everything through Christ who is in me. I work hard. I do what is right. I work as if I work for God, not for men, and so I will succeed. God will bless the works of my hands.” When I am confronted with problems that seem overwhelming, I tell myself that Jesus has overcome the world, and He has given me the power to overcome. I will overcome.”
To win in life, even against all odds, we have to use the power of words.
Now, how about the words we speak to others? How can we enable others to win in life as well?
I propose the ACE formula. ACE is the acrostic for the 3 steps to help others with our words. A is Affirmation. C is for Correction. E stands for Encouragement.
Affirmation means simply a declaration of truth. Correction is the act of pointing out errors so the person will not do them again. And encouragement means inspiring others with courage.
Let me demonstrate an example. Let’s say, my friend XXX is an excellent speaker, but I hate it that she always uses the word irregardless, which is a not a word at all, for it has double negative pronouns. Using the ACE approach, I can start with affirmation. XXX, you know, I really liked your speech the other night. I like the way you organized your ideas and I love the passion you have for your topic. I think you have what it takes to be a competitor for the next speech contest. There is one word, though, that you use that really bothers me. When you use the word, irregardless, I find it hard to concentrate on the rest of your speech. And I’m afraid that other people in the audience, especially the judges, might feel the same way. The correct word is “regardless.” If you can overcome that minor language glitch, I think you’ll do very well. I encourage you to keep practicing because I believe that you will be able to inspire others with your passion and your drive for excellence.”
This ACE approach uses the power of positive words to help others win in life.
On the other hand, we can also abuse the power of the words we use. To remember the words
that can damage or kill lives and spirits, I devised an acrostic – LOSER. L stands for lies. No one wins when the truth is misrepresented. O represents Offensive Language. When we use curse words, when we use sexist, racist, prejudicial words, we hurt instead of help. S stands for slander, which is the act of speaking against others. Yes, it is still slanderous even if it is the truth, when our objective is to kill the reputation of others. E is Envy. Envious words are counterproductive. The success of others should not make us bitter, but should instead inspire us to do even better. And R means Reviling, which is synonymous to Insulting. By reviling someone, we are murdering somebody’s dreams and self esteem. When we lie, speak offensively, slander, envy, and revile others, we abuse the power of words.
So, let me recap the 3 points of my speech. First point is that our words carry tremendous power – the power of life and death. The second point is that words have the power to make us and others win in life. The third point is that we can abuse the power of words when we use them to bring other people down and kill their dreams and self worth.
As a closing thought, I believe that words are outward manifestation of what is in our hearts. Jesus, who is the Word made flesh, teaches us in the book of Luke that “out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks”. If we are just mouthing positive words, we are just being hypocritical, and we will soon run out. But if our hearts overflow with affirmation and encouragement, then our mouths will be speaking words of power. How do we fill our hearts?
With God’s Words. Psalm 19 says that God’s Word is perfect, reviving the soul; trustworthy, making the simple wise. His Words are right, giving joy to the heart. They’re radiant, giving light to the eyes.
With this book in your hand, and God’s words in your heart, we can win in life. (darkness) With this book in your hand, and God’s words in your heart, even in the darkest of hours, there will be light. (flashlight effect)
(Darkness)
Booming Voice: Let there be light! (Turn on lights.)
With 4 little words, the world began. Such is the power of words.
We do not have to be God to wield words of power. Every day, mortals like us speak words that have the power to make things happen, to change our lives and the lives of others.
One of the richest, wisest kings who ever walked the earth once said, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue.” (Prov 18:21) The words of our mouth have the power to kill and the power to give life.
Take the story of Kate Couric, CBS evening news anchor and managing editor. In fourth grade, a teacher scolded her in front of the class and told her in disgust, “Katie, you smile too much.” Those words embarrassed her and almost killed the spirit behind that smile. She carried those words and the unease in her mind and her heart the whole day. It’s a good thing that that night, she was able to talk to her father who uttered words that she would remember for the rest of her life. Her father said, “Just use her words to your advantage.” And so she followed her father’s advice. When she ran for student council presidency, she started her speech by saying, “Hello. My name is Katie Couric. People wonder why I am always smiling. It’s because I am happy. Happy to go to such a wonderful school. Yes, Jamestown is a wonderful school and I’d like to keep it that way.” Her father’s words gave life to Katie Couric’s dreams.
Even as an adult, Katie remembered her father’s words. These words have helped her time and again throughout her life. And now, as the first female solo anchor of a major TV network evening newscast in the United States, she certainly has a lot more to smile about.
Ladies and Gentlemen, our words have power. Think back to when you were a kid, playing and running around. And your mom would shout, Oh, you’re going to fall! And true enough a minute later, you will be down on your knees. The power of words.
Before we set about doing anything, we always verbalize it first. We tell ourselves or someone else, “I’m going to have the cheeseburger.” Or I’m going to have a haircut this weekend.” “I’m going to bungee jump.” I’m going to marry this woman.” “No matter how busy I am, I’m going to prepare this speech and deliver 1 speech a month so I can be a Competent Communicator by yearend.” “I’m going to sit here and mope because I’m depressed.” Chances are, we will do exactly what we say we’ll do.”
The apostle James compared our tongue to the little rudder that directs a big ship. The words we say will determine the direction and orientation of our lives. The power of our words can bring us to the next level of success or limit us from getting anywhere, or worse, even doom us to failure. So watch your words. If you keep telling yourself, you’re a loser, then you can bet on it – you will lose. As for me, I start my days saying, “I can do everything through Christ who is in me. I work hard. I do what is right. I work as if I work for God, not for men, and so I will succeed. God will bless the works of my hands.” When I am confronted with problems that seem overwhelming, I tell myself that Jesus has overcome the world, and He has given me the power to overcome. I will overcome.”
To win in life, even against all odds, we have to use the power of words.
Now, how about the words we speak to others? How can we enable others to win in life as well?
I propose the ACE formula. ACE is the acrostic for the 3 steps to help others with our words. A is Affirmation. C is for Correction. E stands for Encouragement.
Affirmation means simply a declaration of truth. Correction is the act of pointing out errors so the person will not do them again. And encouragement means inspiring others with courage.
Let me demonstrate an example. Let’s say, my friend XXX is an excellent speaker, but I hate it that she always uses the word irregardless, which is a not a word at all, for it has double negative pronouns. Using the ACE approach, I can start with affirmation. XXX, you know, I really liked your speech the other night. I like the way you organized your ideas and I love the passion you have for your topic. I think you have what it takes to be a competitor for the next speech contest. There is one word, though, that you use that really bothers me. When you use the word, irregardless, I find it hard to concentrate on the rest of your speech. And I’m afraid that other people in the audience, especially the judges, might feel the same way. The correct word is “regardless.” If you can overcome that minor language glitch, I think you’ll do very well. I encourage you to keep practicing because I believe that you will be able to inspire others with your passion and your drive for excellence.”
This ACE approach uses the power of positive words to help others win in life.
On the other hand, we can also abuse the power of the words we use. To remember the words
that can damage or kill lives and spirits, I devised an acrostic – LOSER. L stands for lies. No one wins when the truth is misrepresented. O represents Offensive Language. When we use curse words, when we use sexist, racist, prejudicial words, we hurt instead of help. S stands for slander, which is the act of speaking against others. Yes, it is still slanderous even if it is the truth, when our objective is to kill the reputation of others. E is Envy. Envious words are counterproductive. The success of others should not make us bitter, but should instead inspire us to do even better. And R means Reviling, which is synonymous to Insulting. By reviling someone, we are murdering somebody’s dreams and self esteem. When we lie, speak offensively, slander, envy, and revile others, we abuse the power of words.
So, let me recap the 3 points of my speech. First point is that our words carry tremendous power – the power of life and death. The second point is that words have the power to make us and others win in life. The third point is that we can abuse the power of words when we use them to bring other people down and kill their dreams and self worth.
As a closing thought, I believe that words are outward manifestation of what is in our hearts. Jesus, who is the Word made flesh, teaches us in the book of Luke that “out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks”. If we are just mouthing positive words, we are just being hypocritical, and we will soon run out. But if our hearts overflow with affirmation and encouragement, then our mouths will be speaking words of power. How do we fill our hearts?
With God’s Words. Psalm 19 says that God’s Word is perfect, reviving the soul; trustworthy, making the simple wise. His Words are right, giving joy to the heart. They’re radiant, giving light to the eyes.
With this book in your hand, and God’s words in your heart, we can win in life. (darkness) With this book in your hand, and God’s words in your heart, even in the darkest of hours, there will be light. (flashlight effect)
Sunday, November 27, 2005
Bulalo for the Soul by TM Gege Sugue
80 million copies, 65 titles, 37 languages. This book called by Time Magazine as the “publishing phenomenon of the 90s” almost never got produced because it was just too positive. But friends, isn’t it that positive is what we need? In this messed up world we live in, it’s refreshing to know that there are still a lot of good souls out there. It is heartwarming to read real life stories of real people loving, winning, and giving.
But friends, reading about generosity, without applying it to our lives is just like watching Plinky Recto do the aerobics without actually working out ourselves. It does not do anything to exercise or stretch out the soul.
So, what am I saying – I encourage you, friends, to go for more than just chicken soup. An online dictionary defines chicken soup as broth with floating pieces of chicken.
Broth?!
For the hearty appetites of Filipinos, broth is hardly satisfying. We need something meatier, more substantial. Something more filling. Something like bulalo.
Bulalo or marrow is defined as the inmost, choicest, or essential part; the pith. It is the substance of the spinal cord, a fitting metaphor for the essence of life. And so in life, that is what we want. Bulalo. More satisfying than just chicken soup. Our souls are in desperate need for a sampling of bulalo.
Let me recommend to you one way we can taste the bulalo for the soul, or suck the marrow of life.
This ingredient is called volunteerism. Friends, I encourage you to be a volunteer. A volunteer is someone who does something without expecting any returns by way of financial compensation.
I will share with you tonight 3 Ws of Volunteerism – WHY we should volunteer, WHAT we can do as a volunteer and hopefully by the time I get to the last part of my speech you would be asking WHEN you could start volunteering.
Let me start with WHY. There are 3 reasons I want to elaborate on. And these are:
1. As a volunteer, you can change the world.
2. As a volunteer, you can change the lives of others.
3. As a volunteer, you can change your own life.
Changing the world seems like a lofty ambition. But history proves that volunteers do make a difference. In America, the system of slavery was abolished through the efforts of thousands of volunteers. The Revolutionary War was won with the help of an unpaid army. Closer to home, we have the first Edsa People Power Revolution. Countless Filipinos brought food to the camps, transported wounded people, and made human barricades all voluntarily. Volunteers can restore democracy. Volunteers can change the history of a country. Volunteers can change the world.
Volunteerism can change the life of others in a positive way. Let me tell you about Aling Tita. Aling Tita resides at, not around, not near, but inside the North Cemetery. You would think that living in the morbid confines of a cemetery would mean hopelessness and helpless desperation. But when you meet Aling Tita, you will not see somebody who is hopeless, desperate or helpless. You will see a woman who knows she can make a difference. A volunteer group called ATD, All Together in Dignity, initiates discussions with residents from poor communities. They talk about anything and everything; the purpose of the talks is to give people from poor communities a sense of value, a feeling of pride, an affirmation that their voices are being heard. From these talks, the volunteers met Aling Tita who exhibited the characters of a leader. They eventually sponsored her to go to represent the country in a New York meeting on poverty alleviation. This woman, so poor she lives in a cemetery, met and exchanged views with UN Chief Kofi Annan. This woman made the Secretary General, one of the most powerful men in the world, cry and want to do more to alleviate the plight of the poor. Hers is a life that has been changed by the work of volunteers.
Being a volunteer is not all that selfless. A volunteer benefits too from helping others. A University of Michigan study proves that senior citizens who volunteer live longer. The lead psychologist Stephanie Brown of the university's Institute for Social Research theorizes that humans live longer when they have a sense of being important to someone else, the way a new mothers feels important to her infant. There is scientific documentation of volunteers being healed from insomnia, weight problems, cardiovascular disorders, and depression. Helping others also increase our energy, reduce pain, speeds up recovery from surgery, and gives us a happier outlook in life. Another benefit of volunteerism is the building up of marketable skills. For example, you can learn sign language while helping the deaf and the mute.
From my experience, I know that there is instant gratification in volunteering As a Volunteer for the Metropolitan Museum, I was thrilled to learn more about Philippine culture. Seeing the gold jewelry created by Filipinos before the arrival of the Spanish made me realize that we had a rich civilization even before any colonizers came in. As a volunteer for the cancer hospice at the Philippine Children’s Hospital, I learned to value life and health, and I also learned to believe in miracles. And in conducting team-building activities for our church group, I have found a way to integrate my career and my ministry. I am confident that you, too, will find something gratifying in volunteering.
So, my friends, if you want to change the world, help change the lives of others, and change even your own lives, minds and hearts, be a volunteer.
What can you do? The list is practically endless. If your concern is for the environment, you can join the Pasig River clean up projects. If you love the arts, you can bring a wheelchair bound kind to a museum. You can teach sports or even self-defense to abused children. As most of you are HR practitioners, there is so much more you can do – you can give career talks, or you can organize for your company outreach programs that can even function as teambuilding activities. As ToastMasters, we can conduct Public Speaking workshops for the fresh graduates. I have with me a sheaf of papers pulled out from the calendar of Hands on Manila, a non-profit organization that provides flexible volunteer opportunities for community service in Metro Manila. If you scan them, you will discover ways of volunteering you never knew existed. If you are really interested in having bulalo soup and making a difference in the world, you can attend the Volunteer Orientation next week, Nov. 29 at the Greenbelt branch of Powerbooks. That brings us to the last W.
WHEN. When can we start volunteering? I understand that we are all busy. There’s always a report to submit, a project to complete, an event to attend. Our being busy will hardly ever change, and if we always use it as a reason for not volunteering, then we will miss out on the world of opportunities that volunteerism offers. So, I say, let’s start volunteering NOW. The bulalo soup is served steaming hot before you. It’s meaty. It’s tasty. It’s satisfying. It heals mind, body, and soul. It can change our lives, the lives of others. It can change the world. Tonight, tomorrow, check out www.handsonmla.com to find out how you change the world. This bulalo soup has no cholesterol. But it adds flavor to your life, and nourishment to your soul.
(Just adlibbed: Friends, raise your hands, step out and volunteer and you will answer the Toastmaster call for the year – Volunteer and you will “Find your voice of action, and serve the world.”)
But friends, reading about generosity, without applying it to our lives is just like watching Plinky Recto do the aerobics without actually working out ourselves. It does not do anything to exercise or stretch out the soul.
So, what am I saying – I encourage you, friends, to go for more than just chicken soup. An online dictionary defines chicken soup as broth with floating pieces of chicken.
Broth?!
For the hearty appetites of Filipinos, broth is hardly satisfying. We need something meatier, more substantial. Something more filling. Something like bulalo.
Bulalo or marrow is defined as the inmost, choicest, or essential part; the pith. It is the substance of the spinal cord, a fitting metaphor for the essence of life. And so in life, that is what we want. Bulalo. More satisfying than just chicken soup. Our souls are in desperate need for a sampling of bulalo.
Let me recommend to you one way we can taste the bulalo for the soul, or suck the marrow of life.
This ingredient is called volunteerism. Friends, I encourage you to be a volunteer. A volunteer is someone who does something without expecting any returns by way of financial compensation.
I will share with you tonight 3 Ws of Volunteerism – WHY we should volunteer, WHAT we can do as a volunteer and hopefully by the time I get to the last part of my speech you would be asking WHEN you could start volunteering.
Let me start with WHY. There are 3 reasons I want to elaborate on. And these are:
1. As a volunteer, you can change the world.
2. As a volunteer, you can change the lives of others.
3. As a volunteer, you can change your own life.
Changing the world seems like a lofty ambition. But history proves that volunteers do make a difference. In America, the system of slavery was abolished through the efforts of thousands of volunteers. The Revolutionary War was won with the help of an unpaid army. Closer to home, we have the first Edsa People Power Revolution. Countless Filipinos brought food to the camps, transported wounded people, and made human barricades all voluntarily. Volunteers can restore democracy. Volunteers can change the history of a country. Volunteers can change the world.
Volunteerism can change the life of others in a positive way. Let me tell you about Aling Tita. Aling Tita resides at, not around, not near, but inside the North Cemetery. You would think that living in the morbid confines of a cemetery would mean hopelessness and helpless desperation. But when you meet Aling Tita, you will not see somebody who is hopeless, desperate or helpless. You will see a woman who knows she can make a difference. A volunteer group called ATD, All Together in Dignity, initiates discussions with residents from poor communities. They talk about anything and everything; the purpose of the talks is to give people from poor communities a sense of value, a feeling of pride, an affirmation that their voices are being heard. From these talks, the volunteers met Aling Tita who exhibited the characters of a leader. They eventually sponsored her to go to represent the country in a New York meeting on poverty alleviation. This woman, so poor she lives in a cemetery, met and exchanged views with UN Chief Kofi Annan. This woman made the Secretary General, one of the most powerful men in the world, cry and want to do more to alleviate the plight of the poor. Hers is a life that has been changed by the work of volunteers.
Being a volunteer is not all that selfless. A volunteer benefits too from helping others. A University of Michigan study proves that senior citizens who volunteer live longer. The lead psychologist Stephanie Brown of the university's Institute for Social Research theorizes that humans live longer when they have a sense of being important to someone else, the way a new mothers feels important to her infant. There is scientific documentation of volunteers being healed from insomnia, weight problems, cardiovascular disorders, and depression. Helping others also increase our energy, reduce pain, speeds up recovery from surgery, and gives us a happier outlook in life. Another benefit of volunteerism is the building up of marketable skills. For example, you can learn sign language while helping the deaf and the mute.
From my experience, I know that there is instant gratification in volunteering As a Volunteer for the Metropolitan Museum, I was thrilled to learn more about Philippine culture. Seeing the gold jewelry created by Filipinos before the arrival of the Spanish made me realize that we had a rich civilization even before any colonizers came in. As a volunteer for the cancer hospice at the Philippine Children’s Hospital, I learned to value life and health, and I also learned to believe in miracles. And in conducting team-building activities for our church group, I have found a way to integrate my career and my ministry. I am confident that you, too, will find something gratifying in volunteering.
So, my friends, if you want to change the world, help change the lives of others, and change even your own lives, minds and hearts, be a volunteer.
What can you do? The list is practically endless. If your concern is for the environment, you can join the Pasig River clean up projects. If you love the arts, you can bring a wheelchair bound kind to a museum. You can teach sports or even self-defense to abused children. As most of you are HR practitioners, there is so much more you can do – you can give career talks, or you can organize for your company outreach programs that can even function as teambuilding activities. As ToastMasters, we can conduct Public Speaking workshops for the fresh graduates. I have with me a sheaf of papers pulled out from the calendar of Hands on Manila, a non-profit organization that provides flexible volunteer opportunities for community service in Metro Manila. If you scan them, you will discover ways of volunteering you never knew existed. If you are really interested in having bulalo soup and making a difference in the world, you can attend the Volunteer Orientation next week, Nov. 29 at the Greenbelt branch of Powerbooks. That brings us to the last W.
WHEN. When can we start volunteering? I understand that we are all busy. There’s always a report to submit, a project to complete, an event to attend. Our being busy will hardly ever change, and if we always use it as a reason for not volunteering, then we will miss out on the world of opportunities that volunteerism offers. So, I say, let’s start volunteering NOW. The bulalo soup is served steaming hot before you. It’s meaty. It’s tasty. It’s satisfying. It heals mind, body, and soul. It can change our lives, the lives of others. It can change the world. Tonight, tomorrow, check out www.handsonmla.com to find out how you change the world. This bulalo soup has no cholesterol. But it adds flavor to your life, and nourishment to your soul.
(Just adlibbed: Friends, raise your hands, step out and volunteer and you will answer the Toastmaster call for the year – Volunteer and you will “Find your voice of action, and serve the world.”)
Monday, September 19, 2005
Who You Gonna Call? by TM Gege C. Sugue
(Toastmasters Speech Number Two – Speak with Sincerity)
Ladies and Gentlemen, Fellow Toastmasters, good evening. Let me start this speech with a quick question and answer session. I throw out some questions, and you throw back answers, okay?
Question number 1: When your water pipes and your toilet drains are busted, who are you gonna call?
Now, when your television screen suddenly just goes pffft, and all your cable channels disappear, who are you gonna call?
And when you go home one evening, and there is not a scrap of food in the house, and you’re also craving for all-meat topping on a thin crust pizza, who are you going to call?
Now what if it is 11 o’clock on a Saturday evening and you’re alone in your office in a strange country where less than 10% of the population can speak in English, and you’re down on your knees in the dark trying to lock your office door and your key just won’t work, who are you going to call?
Yes, that’s a tough one. I was in that position, and for a moment I did not know whom to call.
Let me tell you the story:
It was late Saturday evening. I was the only one in the office in Hanoi, in Vietnam. I was working on a complicated excel file. It was our product-pricing scheme, an item that has gone through countless revisions. I had to complete it by that evening. The next day, I had an early morning flight for which I have not yet even prepared. I was feeling the pressure. And my brain was not functioning as well as it should. I have been working on this file all week. I have been working hard on a million other things all week. I have not had much sleep. I was exhausted physically, mentally, and emotionally.
My eyes were blurry with all the numbers on the screen. They were blurred as well with tears. I have been crying most of the afternoon because I had a shouting match with our Finance director. I felt bad for getting all-emotional and for allowing one person to get the better of me.
I was having a pity-me party, dwelling on how frustrated I was. I was frustrated because it seemed that my job consisted mainly of putting out fires. Cleaning up messes, solving urgent problems, correcting mistakes. Just when one problem is solved, not a few seconds later, a new problem pops up.
I felt that things were not within my control.
I felt incompetent. I questioned why I was there in the first place. I thought I was there to add value and impart the knowledge that I had, but how could I do that when I cannot even control the situations around me.
I felt incompetent.
Incompetence is something very hard for me to deal with. I work hard. I fancy myself smart. I try to keep updated with all sorts of information. I value my work experiences as having shaped me to be the good manager that I thought I was. And yet, then I felt so incompetent.
It was very hard for my ego to accept my incompetence. I tell myself, “Gege, you’re good. You’re good at what you do”. But with all that I was experiencing in Vietnam, it felt like a lie. It felt like I was not any good.
All these thoughts filled my head, and I just gave up on the pricing scheme I was working on, and decided to pack up and head home.
Since I was the only one in the office, I had to lock the door behind me.
It was one of those double glass door entries, which you lock by using a key on the bottom part of the door.
I was locking the door, and something was wrong. The latch won’t catch and every time I pulled away the key, the door would remain unlocked. And that was a big problem. I could not leave the office unlocked over the weekend. That would have been too irresponsible.
But I could not figure out how to lock the door on my own.
I thought to myself “Who could help me in this situation?”
Using my mobile phone, I called the office administrator asking for his help. Let me remind you that it was close to midnight. Of course, the poor guy was muttering that it was too late, he was in bed, and there was nothing he could do for me. I had to figure it out myself.
I was starting to feel the desperation. Sleeping in the office was not an option because I had to catch a plane very early in the morning.
I seeked help by going down to the building lobby and looked for a guard, somebody, anybody who can help me. I was relieved to find a man, but it was a short-lived relief as I tried to explain to him the situation and realized he did not speak a word of English. I used up all my skills in charades and sign language, but all I got from him was a laugh and some Vietnamese words that I, of course, could not understand.
It seemed hopeless.
I took the elevator back up to the 7th floor. On the way there, I was crying. More accurately, I was bawling, practically screaming. I screamed to God, because there was no one else to scream at. I screamed to God to help me out. I had no one else to call, and I had no idea what to do.
Let me tell you something about myself, I am mechanically challenged. I am the exact opposite of Mc Gyver. I always had my handyman husband to do the mechanical stuff for me. And in this situation, I was completely clueless. And my handyman was hundreds of miles away.
So, I just prayed and cried out to God to help me. He was my last and only hope.
And so I went back to the door. In the dark, I got on my knees and prayed once more for God to help me.
As my hands touched the floor, I felt something, and I realized that I had broken my key chain, and I was holding a piece of metal from that key chain. Now, something (and I knew it was not my mechanically challenged brain) told me to reach out into the lock hole on the floor, and fish out something from there. And I did just that. I put my finger into the small hole, and I drew out a tiny particle of my broken key chain. Then I tried to lock the door again, and alleluia, the door locked!
And I was able to leave the office. On the way out, I was crying and laughing at the same time. Praising God and thanking Him for saving me once again, as He has done so many times in the past.
Some may call it luck, some may call it common sense, I call it God.
I called on God, and He let the Holy Spirit tell me what to do.
In Jeremiah 33:3, God says: “Call to me and I will answer you, and I will tell you things which you do not know.”
In desperate situations, whom are you going to call?
In situations of utter incompetence and complete ignorance, whom are you going to call?
When there is no one around to help you, there is One Person who is always there just waiting to be called to help. And He will answer you and even tell you things you do not know.
And that’s exactly what He did on that Saturday evening in Hanoi.
As I dwelled about that event in my life, I realized that all my depression and frustration were products of my ego-centeredness. I had relied too much on my own strength, my own knowledge, my own skills to get me through something that was just beyond me. So much so that when things were not going well, I blamed myself for everything. Every little mistake was my fault. I just wasn’t good enough, smart enough, experienced enough. I focused too much on trying to achieve something to impress others with what I knew and what I could do, that when I couldn’t do enough, I just felt inadequate, incompetent.
I had made it too much about me. When all along it simply wasn’t about me at all.
That Saturday evening I learned that in every situation, there is Somebody I can always call on. He is the expert in everything, even in mechanical situations such as doors that won’t lock
Let me repeat what God says in Jeremiah 33:3:
“Call to me, and I will answer you, and tell you things you do not know.
There are a lot of things I do not know. But there is one thing I do know. And for this I praise and thank God every day of my life.
I know that my salvation is not about how good I am. It is about how good God is.
Good evening.
From Cover to Cover by TM Gege C. Sugue
(Toastmasters Speech Number One – Icebreaker, Unedited Version)
Ladies and Gentlemen, Fellow Toastmasters, aside from God and my husband, there are two other great loves of my life.
One love is reading.
The other is traveling.
To me, reading is the same thing as traveling; except I can do it white staying glued to a chair, or more often to my bed. Plus, it costs me much less. Reading transports me to places, exposes me to different cultures, and never leaves me unchanged.
Friends, this is one favorite read. Blindness by Nobel Peace prize winner, Jose Saramao. I like it because of the literary style. Saramago has been compared to Kafka, but to me he has a style uniquely his own. In this novel, he never uses proper names to identify the characters. He uses descriptors like “the man with the eyepatch”, “the girl with insomnia”, “the woman with dark glasses”, or “the son of the woman with the dark glasses”. Yet the quality and richness of the narrative never suffers.
What I like best about this book is the premise itself.
It starts with the experience of a man suddenly losing his sense of sight. Suddenly all he could see was a sea of white. Imagine his shock. Imagine his confusion. Imagine his fear. How could he find his way back home? How could he be seeing one minute, and be blind the next?
And all around the city, different people were experiencing the same phenomenon.
That is how the story starts. This is a story of an epidemic of blindness.
Close your eyes for a moment and open your mind –- imagine an epidemic of blindness. I could be standing here and suddenly, I’m blind. Tomorrow, all of you in this room will go blind. The day after, all the people in your household will be blind as well.
Imagine an epidemic of blindness in your home, in your town, in this country, in the world.
Imagine the chaos. Imagine the accidents. Imagine the hysteria. Imagine what the government would do. Imagine how good people would go mad. Imagine how already evil people would get even more vile.
Imagining is the best thing about reading. It’s never just about the words and the lines we read. It’s what goes on between the lines. It’s what goes on in between your ears. Reading makes you imagine, makes you think. It expands mind, heart, soul, and spirit. Reading adds drama to my life.
My life is not all that dramatic. I would not call it boring since there is always something new and exciting happening. But the basic plot is hardly worthy of submission to Charo Santo or Mel Tiango for dramatization on TV. My childhood was as typical as typical could be. Middle class family. My parents were both Certified Public Accountants, loving, responsible, conservative folks who did not have substance or physical abuse issues. My life revolved around school and home. It was pretty mundane.
The greatest adventures of my childhood were spent with a redheaded 18-year-old girl called Nancy. Nancy Drew solved mysteries. I solved math problems. Nancy Drew was an only child. I was number 2 of 7. Nancy Drew lived an exciting life. She traveled to Cairo and London, Bangkok, Hollow Oak, and Larkspur lane. With Nancy Drew, I’ve gone skiing, I’ve ridden in a stagecoach, driven a convertible. With Nancy Drew, I’ve joined the circus, gone camping, gone on a quest for a missing map, and solved the mystery of the fire dragon.
From Nancy Drew, I made a huge leap to Harold Robbins. Harold Robbins was my first sex education teacher. My mother tried to hide her Robbins books, but remember that I was Nancy Drew. I was a sleuth. I could find things that are hidden. And I could hide things so that they could not be found.
Eventually, I realized I was too young for Harold Robbins. So I calibrated by reading the more age-appropriate Sweet Dreams and Sweet Valley High series. I was reading P.S. I Love You when I had my first boyfriend at the age of 15, a couple of years before college. For the first time, my reading material and my real life were running parallel.
You would think that loving books as I did, I would have taken up journalism in college. I almost did, but my mom gave me what seemed then like wise advice – “Anak, walang pera sa journalism.” And to a teenager who wanted to have the latest fashions, Sperry Topsiders and penny loafers, not having money was a very bad thing. So I chose architecture, and then shifted to Clothing Technology, which brought me to a career in fashion. For 10 years of my life, I was so involved in work that I hardly had time to read. I read fashion books.
Then I traded fashion books for books like this. This Herb Bible and all my other books on cooking and home decorating signified my maturing into a spouse and home manager, my evolution into a domestic diva. Yes I was, and still am, a Martha Stewart wannabe. As a Mrs., I relished the joys of being a housewife, cooking puttanesca and making pannacotta. The homemaker in me, however, hardly stayed home. Most of the time, my husband and I were off to some place we have not yet been.
And that brings me to another favorite book. Lonely Planet – where my two great loves, reading and traveling, collide. It gives me boundless joy to explore this amazing country of 7,100 islands. I brought this book along with me to Pagudpod, Palawan, Boracay, Bohol, Rizal and even to forgotten corners of Manila. This book will continue to travel with me to other places I still long to visit – Batanes, Camiguin, Surigao.
In the meantime, however, Philippine island hopping has to wait as I take a momentary exile in a totally different land, a land whose language, culture, and flavors are so unique, so exotic, so rich that not even Lonely Planet Vietnam can capture its spirit.
Vietnam is an amazingly beautiful country, but for somebody far from home, away from family, friends, everyone and everything comfortable, it was also a land of darkness. Hanoi is almost always overcast. The gray of the skies manage to seep into my soul. And it was so spiritually dark for me.
Again, it is a book that turned my life around. And this is the greatest book of all. This is not my regular bible. My regular bible is bigger, heavier, and much dirtier with scribbles and highlights, frayed on the edges, and some pages torn off the spine. But whether it is the old bible, or this new, hip, metal-encased version, the words inside are the same words of non-negotiable truth straight from God’s lips to my hungry heart.
This book contains God’s love letters to me. This book revives my soul, gives joy to my heart, and gives light to my eyes. This book heals. This book saves. This book guides. This book comforts me. This book is alive.
Yes, books are my life. And this particular book is my life.
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